National Jerk Off Day 

In today's world, anyone can make up a holiday (i.e., Kwanzaa).

It has thus been declared that from this day on, April 2 will be known as National Jerk Off Day. Males of all ages should beat off on this day to their dick’s content! (Just because they can)

My African friend tells me that Kwanzaa is fake, but he believes in National Jerk Off Day!

National Jerk Off Day by MOCO & P-Phat February 11, 2009

Go Jerk Off 

What you should do before creating bullshit sexual position on Urban Dictionary.

Instead of writing a David Hasselhoff sexual position definition, the 15 year old virgin decided to just go jerk off instead.

Go Jerk Off by Pointer of the Obvious August 25, 2008

Double suicide jerk off 

When masturbating, scream “MUM!” “DAD!” And try to blow your load before they enter the room, if you don’t do it in time you have to actually hang yourself.

Police 1: “How’d he go?”
Police2: “He attempted a double suicide jerk off.... And failed”

Double suicide jerk off by EynonC December 22, 2019

National Jerk Off Day 

December 1st is a holiday for all the brave boys and men who fought through their urges throughout No Nut November! It’s a celebration of what they accomplished and what they will do during Destroy Dick December!

National Jerk Off Day is on December 1st! A celebration of what’s accomplished during No Nut November!!

National Jerk Off Day by FlareHC October 18, 2019

No Jerk Off July

No Jerk Off July is July, but no jerking off. You can use other ways to shoot hot steaming cum all over your mechanical keyboard, just don't jerk off. Only real men can do this.

Obama: Ah yes, time to jerk off to Michelle's feet.

Tyrone: Hol' up. You can't jerk off, it's No Jerk Off July!

Obama: Ah, right, I'll just rape her instead.

No Jerk Off July by IJerkOffDuringJuly November 4, 2019

national jerk off your homies day

on april 13, it's your time to jerk off your homies. 🍆✊🏿💦

grab dick of homie and go ham "yeah bro it's national jerk off your homies day"

national jerk off your homies day by hahahimgay May 25, 2018

How To Jerk Off

If you are wondering how to jerk off, it is very simple. All you have to do is use 1 of your hands and grab your penis...Then you rub it by stroking it up and down. You should use lube that way nothing happens to you. Jerking off is really fun. And if you jerk off it doesn't mean that you are gay.....you can do it with friends or anyone you choose it doesn't matter if they call you gay your not trust me. And that is all you have to do is sroke ur penis back and forth to make it more entertaining you can finger your ass or rub ur nipples or what ever you want to do. I do mine while I am taking a shit that way no1 knows and you have have a nice job done.

Jerking off is very simple, I will teach you "How To Jerk Off"

How To Jerk Off by NellyBoy NY March 14, 2009