A seemingly objective standard of evidence that is, by its very nature, impossible to meet in the given context. The goal is the lack of proof; it's a criterion designed to be perpetually unfulfilled, thereby permanently protecting a belief from disconfirmation. It’s the ultimate defensive rhetorical fortification.
Goalproof Example: A conspiracy theorist claims, “The government is run by lizard people. Any document or expert saying otherwise is part of the cover-up, so the only goalproof would be a lizard person voluntarily revealing itself on live TV.” Since this will never happen (by their own definition of the cover-up), their belief is rendered unfalsifiable and “proven” by the lack of proof.
by Dumuabzu February 8, 2026
Get the Goalproof mug.1. Guelph
(verb) An Onomatopoeia; To eject material in manner best described as (superficially or otherwise) moist and high-velocity. Oftentimes ends with a squelching or splashing sound.
2. Guelph
(noun) A City in southern Ontario, Canada
3. from Guelph
(idiom) An informal, generally negative figure of speech used to denote something of dubious quality, unusual circumstance/behaviour or otherwise poor opinion.
(verb) An Onomatopoeia; To eject material in manner best described as (superficially or otherwise) moist and high-velocity. Oftentimes ends with a squelching or splashing sound.
2. Guelph
(noun) A City in southern Ontario, Canada
3. from Guelph
(idiom) An informal, generally negative figure of speech used to denote something of dubious quality, unusual circumstance/behaviour or otherwise poor opinion.
Example 1:
man 1: Unbelievable, that guy just shot mud out of a cannon with a mighty guelph and splattered that poor beach-goer.
man 2: Just absolutely slathered him with sauce, he did.
Example 2:
kid: I'm on lava reef zone in Sonic 3 and I keep dying to those fire shooters coming from the walls.
dad: oh, yeah, those. it's weird, rather than shooting the fire, it sounds like they guelph it, as if they literally say the word.
kid: what the hell are you talking about man
Example 3:
woman: bruh is this the soup from guelph? this shit tastes odious.
line cook: on jeff the killer's grave take it up w the chef
head chef: this pussy from guelph trippin... fuck outta my 'straunt before i consolidate you
man 1: Unbelievable, that guy just shot mud out of a cannon with a mighty guelph and splattered that poor beach-goer.
man 2: Just absolutely slathered him with sauce, he did.
Example 2:
kid: I'm on lava reef zone in Sonic 3 and I keep dying to those fire shooters coming from the walls.
dad: oh, yeah, those. it's weird, rather than shooting the fire, it sounds like they guelph it, as if they literally say the word.
kid: what the hell are you talking about man
Example 3:
woman: bruh is this the soup from guelph? this shit tastes odious.
line cook: on jeff the killer's grave take it up w the chef
head chef: this pussy from guelph trippin... fuck outta my 'straunt before i consolidate you
by Jockstrap Cowboy February 28, 2026
Get the Guelph mug.When a man abandons the boys on a regular basis to make repeated pilgrimages to the University of Guelph for his girlfriend.
by anon23234 March 25, 2026
Get the Guelphing mug.by geniuschild January 14, 2023
Get the Arush Goel mug.Defender of methamphetamine manufacturers as opposed to genocide survivors protected by laws terminal genocidal homicidal exclusive and elitist cultist terrorists
by Cody5050 January 27, 2022
Get the Justice Douglas of guelph mug.A defensive tactic where, when faced with overwhelming evidence that meets the stated standard, the arguer changes the criteria for what makes evidence trustworthy itself. The goal (what’s needed) and the proof (what counts) are both shifted simultaneously in a single, fluid maneuver.
Example:
Example:
Moving the Goalproof Example:
“Show me a reputable media report on that.”
You show a report from the Associated Press.
“The AP is part of the corporate media complex. Their ‘facts’ are compromised. You’d need a leak from a brave whistleblower inside.”
They’ve moved the goalproof—redefining both the source and the nature of acceptable evidence in one move.
“Show me a reputable media report on that.”
You show a report from the Associated Press.
“The AP is part of the corporate media complex. Their ‘facts’ are compromised. You’d need a leak from a brave whistleblower inside.”
They’ve moved the goalproof—redefining both the source and the nature of acceptable evidence in one move.
by Dumuabzu February 8, 2026
Get the Moving the Goalproof mug.