Jizz Merchant

One who peddles ejaculate.

You are a Jizz Merchant. Wootenanny!

by KillBill2303 February 18, 2010

patter merchant

Someone who has terrific banter, jokes and charisma. Patter merchant is a compliment, not an insult.

"Have you met JP?"
"Aye, mate, proper patter merchant!"

by JamaoDosSantos November 16, 2020

lol merchant

A person who gives out so many lol's he could sell them and make a tidy profit

Man that guys such a lol merchant, nah he's a jew

by MCMMC November 19, 2010

Till Merchant

In convenience stores, one is expected to work on the tills and work on the floor and do daily tasks. A till merchant is someone who sits back and watches others work their bollocks off while they can relax and chill

Will “Hey why is Nathan never on the floor?”
Alex “Because he’s a till merchant!”

by Natedog02 June 28, 2022

Dream Merchant

A person or corporate entity that specializes in, or claims to be capable of, helping people fulfill their dreams, fantasies, or deepest aspirations. They are most often empty promises, and the recipients of such services are usually expected to pay a fee in return.

BEWARE of the words: "Come with me and I'll make you famous!" For they are usually uttered from the lips of Dream Merchants.

by Execaters April 24, 2018

attention merchant

Someone who is unreasonably difficult with complying to agreements and decisions for the sake of being the center of attention.

Noah: I'm not fucking coming to the LAN party
Clay: You can use my PC and I'll pick you up bro
Noah: I'm not fucking coming
Mukul: You're such an attention merchant Noah.

by muksaw February 11, 2023

Fanny merchant

to flatter with faint praise, a brown noser, kiss ass

"Hi, I just love the way your eyes shimmer like the stars".

"Go away, dont be such a fanny merchant."

by Endersons' February 02, 2016