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Schlump (SH-lǔmp)
Past tense - Schlumped
Present tense - Schlumping

“To schlump.”

Sticking your male genitalia into either a fruit or vegetable. This action is usually done at the grocery store in conjunction with edging. Schlumping is commonly done at lunch time or whilst eating a healthy snack.
*Example 1*
Guy 1 - “Hey man can you help me out right now?”
Guy 2 - “nah I’m too busy Schlumping right now maybe later.”

*Example 2*
Guy 1 - “Hey man I thought you were at the party, where are you?”
Guy 2 - “I’m Schlumping my shit crazy style in the produce aisle!”

*Example 3*
Guy 1 - “Hey, have you seen our Halloween pumpkins?”
Guy 2 - “Aww sorry man, I’ve Schlumped em’ all”
Schlump by Mister_Craigy March 20, 2024
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When you tie two penises together in a knot, and you are merely a spectator.
I schlumped Walter and Harbert
Schlump by yourpep242 April 25, 2024
Related Words
When you and two other people get together and you tie the two other penises together in a knot.
Schlump by yourpep242 April 25, 2024

schlumping 

Schlumping is what happens when the structure of an object, or theoretically a person or animal, partially collapses, resulting in an awkward lean or tilt.

Schlumping was used to describe the state of Mr. Bix's borphin in the Dr. Suess book "did I ever tell you how luck you are".
Every morning at six Mr. Bix wakes up because he has a borphin to fix. His borphin is schlumping and he must unschlump it before the next night.
schlumping by bob_johnson September 20, 2024
The act of taking a wet, open-faced adult diaper and drinking the piss from the padding
I took my diaper off, and my boyfriend asked, “Can I schlurp that thang?”
schlurp by bababerry August 28, 2025

alter schlumpf 

When you leak nudes from somebody with somebody else and after you’re getting exposed for it you blame everybody else.
Yo your girlfriends nudes got exposed did you did it?

Yes but I still fuck her because I did the alter Schlumpf.

Papa Schlump 

Papa Schlump is the best character from Smurfs. He is extremely handsome, and very wise. He is old, but he would be a good sugar dada. If I were you, I would have him as your favorite character.
x: “who is your fav character from Smurfs?”
Y: “Papa Schlump duh!”
Papa Schlump by fifi wifi May 6, 2022