Religion

Did I already do my take on this?

Religion "Well... You can't have what you want now... And maybe not ever... But if you do what I want you to do now... And then do that indefinitely... THEN... Then, you're DEFINITELY going to get what you want when you're dead! But do what I want you to do now because *insert semantic reconfiguration of reality to justify your subsidiarity to me*"

Hym "Do you have what you want, like, now or?"

Religion "Wha-er, What? Well... Yeah, I was doing the thing though."

Hym "Yeah... You say that... But I saw you NOT doing the thing and I don't believe that you're doing the thing when I'm not around..."

Religion "Well, umm... No, I did the thing..."

Hym "You certainly did A thing... What did you do? Wait... What's that book? You wrote it down? Lemme see..."

Religion "Umm... Yes?"

Hym "Yeahyeahyeah lemme see. I'm just going to bounce around... Ok.. Burned a city to the ground... Nailed an innocent guy to some wood... Killed a bunch of people and kidnapped their daughters!? WHAT!?"

Religion "Umm..."

Hym "Is THAT not YOUR little girl!?"

Little girl "Hi."

Hym "OHOHO! MAN! THAT... THAT is tragic! WOW! You are fucking twisted man. That is fucking twisted! Hahaha! You want ME to do THAT!?"

Religion "I mean... Yes?"

Hym "OK!"
😵🗡😁
Religion "HRRRGHK!!"

Hym "Hahahaha... *Sigh* Haaa... Now what do little girls eat? Do you eat priest?"

Little girl "No..."

Hym "Yeah, no I didn't think so... Hmm... I'll figure it out later."

by Hym Iam November 28, 2023

religion

Another word for Cult. While i think some religions are fine. most if not almost all religions are false beliefs that people follow to the grave. people think they can just horrible hate crimes or just murder someone and then pray. most don't use religion for the good they say they do."Leviticus 19:18: "You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against any of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself." most Christians don't follow this, in fact most Christians haven't even read the bible.

"Oh Hello There Young Lady, Wanna Join Our Religion?" "No, I'm an Atheist." "HOW DARE YOU!"

by SoClaos November 27, 2024

Religion Baiting

A method of baiting people into liking or subscribing into a channel by using religion. Examples: Like and subscribe if you love Jesus!

I caught a YouTuber religion baiting.

by dswqsa895 December 26, 2023

religion

Something that made sense a few thousands years ago, but is irrelevant now.

You all need to embrace religion in your lives or you will burn in hell!
Nah, I'm good.

by Dzheres January 13, 2024

Religiophobia

Fear or hatred of religious people especially those of the Abrahamic religions, Judaism, Islam, and Christianity.

Tom: Religious people are suckers and morons.

Sam: That's religiophobia!

by Blue Kryptonite February 20, 2024

Religion

Religion (only in reference to wrong religion)

R = Right (even when it's wrong).
E = Elitist.
L = Lying (Well; they can't ALL be right)?
I = Ignoring the real problems.
G = Gimme!
I = Ignorant.
O = Ornery (means: burdensome).
N = Nonsense (again; some of it).

Religion is the Opium of the masses.

by Smeaglez April 10, 2024

Religious fuck boy

Someone who reads marsiyas, salaams, Nohas, etc and thinks he’s going to heaven cause of looking like he has some status in the community for being religious AND ‘cool’
Upon further investigation said fuck boy usually never dropped his balls, and developed a low enough pitch just to do the right thing

Uhlee mowe-sin is a religious fuck boy

by Miktionary April 20, 2024