Skip to main content

masturbate

What people do when they are horny

You probably are horny right now, so here goes nothing

*He dimmed his lights, his heart beating in anticipation. His pants felt too tight, and he sat down on his chair, opening his laptop. He clicked on porn hub, and luckily he was home alone so he played the dirty moans at full volume. He put his palm on his pants, feeling his hardening cock. He pressed against it, shuddering in pleasure. The video intensified, making him even more desperate, so he quickly unbuttons his pants and lets his dick breathe. It’s slick with precum, and he keeps his eyes glued to the hot video as his fist closes over his thick member. He lets out a shudder, then pumps his fist, slowly at first. He then starts going faster, thrusting his hips into his hand, jerking himself off. He feels his cock get heavy, ready to cum. And he stops. He knows it’ll all pay off when he has an even better orgasm after edging. He pants, his high going down. He slowly rubs the tip of his cock with his forefinger and thumb, whimpering. Then he enclosed it in his fist again, slowly getting faster and faster as his moans mingled in with the videos. He felt his cock fill up again and his balls tighten, and with one last thrust, he orgasmed. Hot streams of cum shot out from his cock, splattering on his stomach. He shot far, and kept rubbing his cock as he went down from his high.*
I was horny so I masturbated.
by superhornydefinitions March 18, 2024
mugGet the masturbatemug.

Intellectual Masturbation

The act of thinking, discussing, and/or philosophizing to no one’s spiritual, mental, or physical benefit, but purely for the sake of one’s own pleasure, intellectual self-satisfaction, and/or pride.

Note: Not all intellectual and philosophical discussion is intellectual masturbation, it only falls under the definition when it doesn’t benefit those in engaged in it, only harms due to wasted time and an artificial satisfaction in one’s self.
I remember when all I would do was engage in intellectual masturbation on Discord. I would use fancy words and blabber all day about philosophy, without actually applying it in any way whatsoever. I just derived pleasure from hearing myself speak about such abstract and complex subjects. What a fool I was.
by Tea76Crumpets796 October 1, 2022
mugGet the Intellectual Masturbationmug.

Masturbate

What the fuck is wrong with you jackoffs get a girlfriend already
I masturbate because im lonely
by 5Skin not 4Skin January 9, 2020
mugGet the Masturbatemug.

masturbation

when you beat the absolute living shit out of your meat package so fucking hard, that a liquid located inside of your ballsack called "semen", "cum" or "jizz", rapidly shoots out of your penis hole at 800 miles an hour.

it can also lead to your girlfriend becoming pregnant and having children if shooting out your hot sticky jizz while your erect, fat, thick, juicy cock is located inside of her vagina/pussy.
(alone (masturbating))
guy: omagash im boutta cum a large quan-titty of kids after this daily and excessive masturbation

(with partner)
guy: oh my gosh im gonna shoot my hot cum inside of your pussy!!!!!!!11111
girl: shoot it inside of me daddy uwu
by Hypurrelet August 14, 2023
mugGet the masturbationmug.

Masturbate

Verb

To stroke your penis up and down until white shit comes out the top.
I masturbate every night.
by Joetherealone September 29, 2021
mugGet the Masturbatemug.

masturbate

I would masturbate all night
by qqqqqqqqrrrrrrrr November 14, 2021
mugGet the masturbatemug.

no masturbate march

a month where only women are allowed to masturbate and men are not allowed to, like no nut november.
john: hey im going to go masturbate
amelia: no you cant its no masturbate march hahah
by depressed banana February 28, 2025
mugGet the no masturbate marchmug.

Share this definition