Intellectual Masturbation

i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias

She spent her days in intellectual masturbation over the one that got away...

by BitchfinderGeneral March 5, 2024

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Masturbating Mike Tyson

When a man’s penis is so long he has to assume the classic Mike Tyson peek-a-boo boxing stance — elbows tucked, fists up by his face — to reach it during masturbation. Typically involves a downward squat and intense focus, resembling a fighter preparing for battle… but for very different reasons.

“Bro, I caught Kyle in the bathroom doing the Masturbating Mike Tyson. Dude looked like he was about to throw hands with his own junk.”

by A Dude Booty Meat June 2, 2025

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Oral masturbation

Oral masturbation is when I suck my own dick until I cum in my mouth

Once I found out I could suck my own dick I began to oral masturbate daily still do oral masturbation is using one's mouth to perform oral sex on themselves self-sucking auto fellatio oral masturbation

by Big D Sexton Bloomington, in July 12, 2024

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Religious Masturbation

Religious Masturbation.

Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.

A religious leader preaching to the saved

Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.

The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved

by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019

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