When you and your friends hide in a tree and jump down when people walk beneath you, scaring the crap out of them
Dude, remember that one time we were playing night monkey and I got chased?
Oh dude that was so funny!
Oh dude that was so funny!
by Nicky J! April 23, 2009
Get the Night Monkey mug.A police officer, especially one who reflexively uses his or her Taser in situations in which a real cop would rely on his or her wits and communication skills.
Peace Loving Citizen: Excuse me, officer, might you have the time?
Taser Monkey (later, to Grand Jury): The perpetrator approached me and presented a reasonable request in a peaceable manner. I had no choice but to tase him. And tasers are "non-lethal" so it's obvious he died on purpose just to frame me.
Grand Jury: But your victim was a 90-year-old man with a heart condition in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank... asking for the time. And you killed him.
Taser Monkey: Exactly. He could have been a terrorist with a wheelchair bomb, plotting to kill me and everyone else in the area. A lesser cop might have answered with the time and we could all be dead right now!
Grand Jury: Oh right! What were we thinking? Of course we'll side with you no matter what. Fuck the citizens!
Taser Monkey (later, to Grand Jury): The perpetrator approached me and presented a reasonable request in a peaceable manner. I had no choice but to tase him. And tasers are "non-lethal" so it's obvious he died on purpose just to frame me.
Grand Jury: But your victim was a 90-year-old man with a heart condition in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank... asking for the time. And you killed him.
Taser Monkey: Exactly. He could have been a terrorist with a wheelchair bomb, plotting to kill me and everyone else in the area. A lesser cop might have answered with the time and we could all be dead right now!
Grand Jury: Oh right! What were we thinking? Of course we'll side with you no matter what. Fuck the citizens!
by taserbrain February 12, 2010
Get the Taser Monkey mug.Related Words
monkey
• monke
• monk
• monkey nuts
• Monkey Boy
• monkeybutt
• monkeyman
• monkeyfuck
• Monkey Wrench
• monkey ball
Boss: Kathryn what are you doing?
Kathryn: I'za doin my werk like a good Paper Monkey!
Guy on a first date: So what do you do for a living?
Girl: I work at a car dealership, processing loan applications.
Guy: Ohh! Your a Paper Monkey!
Kathryn: I'za doin my werk like a good Paper Monkey!
Guy on a first date: So what do you do for a living?
Girl: I work at a car dealership, processing loan applications.
Guy: Ohh! Your a Paper Monkey!
by RedRibbonSword October 19, 2010
Get the PAPER MONKEY mug.Cradling your significant other's hefty ball sacks in the cup of your hand, taking pressure off the penal area known as the perineum.
Hey dude?
YEah man...
Your balls look tired
Yeah i had a rough day
Weellllllll i mean ill cradle monkey them for a little bit so they can relieve circulation.....i mean if thats okay..
.........ummmm sure.....is that gay?
No man not at all........let me do it
YEah man...
Your balls look tired
Yeah i had a rough day
Weellllllll i mean ill cradle monkey them for a little bit so they can relieve circulation.....i mean if thats okay..
.........ummmm sure.....is that gay?
No man not at all........let me do it
by HPFBanana Hammock March 31, 2011
Get the Cradle Monkey mug.John: WTF? Twitter is down again!
Jim: I'm sure the Twitter tech monkeys will have it fixed it no time.
Jim: I'm sure the Twitter tech monkeys will have it fixed it no time.
by LittleNano April 7, 2011
Get the tech monkeys mug.Dawn: You are the best guy ever. I can't believe we are in this relationship. I've always wanted someone like you in my life.
Bob: I didn't know you were this much of a gush monkey. :p. It's cute.
Bob: I didn't know you were this much of a gush monkey. :p. It's cute.
by gushmonkey May 10, 2011
Get the Gush monkey mug.A sexual position on the secret last page of the kama sutra sex book, in which the male hangs upside down from a rope attatched to the ceiling and another male/female hangs from the first males genitals. The rope is then rapidly swung in an anti clockwise direction, putting a lot of stress on the first males genitals; the primary objective being to enlarge the penis.
faiz had a 7 foot long dick, must have been practisibg the spazzy monkey often.
danesh has the biggest penis I have ever seen. That's coz he does the spazzy monkey with joshua
danesh has the biggest penis I have ever seen. That's coz he does the spazzy monkey with joshua
by Al Jabreezi Jihad November 23, 2013
Get the spazzy monkey mug.