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Intellectual Masturbation

i.e. this is when one derives sexual pleasure contemplating an object or subject, and/or overthinking something outwith their expertise resulting in grandiosity from confirmation bias
She spent her days in intellectual masturbation over the one that got away...
by BitchfinderGeneral March 5, 2024
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masturbation meditation

A deep state of mind that allows you to cum with nothing touching your dick/vagina.
by Reagulayte January 3, 2020
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Masturbation

What 100% of men do and can’t go more than two days without doing it.
What 50% of women do while the other 50 never even has the desire to do...
Masturbation is the polite way of saying that you fucked yourself.
by Biden is a dick April 21, 2021
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Oral masturbation

Oral masturbation is when I suck my own dick until I cum in my mouth
Once I found out I could suck my own dick I began to oral masturbate daily still do oral masturbation is using one's mouth to perform oral sex on themselves self-sucking auto fellatio oral masturbation
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Religious Masturbation

Religious Masturbation.

Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.

A religious leader preaching to the saved

Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.
The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved
by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019
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Anti-Masturbation Cross

An anti-masturbation cross is a device used by wankerphobic Christians. It combines the cross with straps to keep people from the age of 5+ from masturbating. It should be ended to help end wankerphobia.
John's parents are going to buy an anti-masturbation cross. I'm praying for him. I think Seb may have tipped them off.
by A_Manwithhiv April 22, 2021
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Masturbating

What you were trying to do when your Mom caught you.
Chad were you masturbating?
No Mom my pants just slipped down and I was pulling them up!
by Squidbob October 12, 2021
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