Skip to main content

Self-Blumpkin Technique

The self-bumpkin technique is performed by first waiting 7-10 days without taking a shit, and then when finally shitting, curving the large feces toward you, under your balls, up from between your legs, and into your dick. You then suck the shit back in and out of your ass, repeating this movement until ejaculation. This technique results in euphoria, as well as chlamydia, herpes, HPV, gonorrhea, and syphilis. Also you may notice black discharge from the urethra 2-12 hours after performing this technique.

It is told that performing this technique 7 times can result in ascension to a higher plane of spiritual existence, however no one has survived the process more than 3 times.
“Dude, I’m about to try the self-blumpkin technique! I’m 6 days in without shitting!”

“Bro I wouldn’t do that. I tried it 4 years ago and there’s still black shit in my dick.”
by Rusted Sounding Rod April 29, 2025
mugGet the Self-Blumpkin Technique mug.

Blumpkin spice latte

When you shit your pants in the Starbucks drive thru and your girl is giving you a blow job while you order her a pumpkin spice latte.
Can I get a blumpkin spice latte please with extra whipped cream
by Touchedbythetismgurl May 6, 2025
mugGet the Blumpkin spice latte mug.

North Korean Blumpkin

When your partner is cosplaying as a character from any source of media while you get a blumpkin from them. While getting the Blumpkin, you scroll through your phone looking at rule 34 of that character their cosplaying.
by iloveblumpkin1234567890 May 18, 2025
mugGet the North Korean Blumpkin mug.

Busy Blumpkin

Pissing and shitting while receiving a blumpkin.
“Yo, last night this bitch gave me a busy blumpkin.”
by fallout4luvr May 18, 2025
mugGet the Busy Blumpkin mug.

Mongolian blumpkin fister

When the giver puts their arms, legs, and head, up the receiver’s rectum and begins to rotate it violently fast until the receiver begins to fecalate and their feces gets spread all over their intestines

(Genghis Khan favorite sexual act (rumored))
by Gilf Destroyer 6969 May 20, 2025
mugGet the Mongolian blumpkin fister mug.

Blue Collar Blumpkin

A sex act in which an individual receives a blowjob while defecting in a porta potty on a job site.
The union guarantees us two 15-minute breaks per shift; I typically use one for a cigarette and the other for a Blue Collar Blumpkin.
by Mikey1965 May 31, 2025
mugGet the Blue Collar Blumpkin mug.

Commuter’s Blumpkin

Receiving a blowjob while actively pooping your pants behind the wheel.
She started going down on me, and I shit my pants halfway through — full Commuter’s Blumpkin.
by Mikey1965 May 31, 2025
mugGet the Commuter’s Blumpkin mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email