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Carpenters Bukkake

Stemming from ancient Nordic boatbuilding times, this traditional hazing ritual has been rebirthed in the extended modern woodworking community and is still revered as a right of passage in this noblest of trades

An appreciative apprentice kneels within a standing circle of their peers, where as a true sign of respect, proceed to masturbate furiously over the face of "the chosen one".

Once the youngling has been supremely coated, this is directly followed by a large battering of sawdust to aid the curing process.

An important step is to have Rick Astley play in the background.

The pupil now becomes the plastered master
A-Boy: The new guys really coming into his own, how long has he been here for?
B-Boy: I remember his first day, has to be about three years now
C-Boy: Oh boy, looks like he's prime for a Carpenters Bukkake, I'll grab the lube and dust
A-Boy: (singing) never gonna, never gonna, never gonna...
B-Boy: Kneel child, it's time for us to pay our respects
D-Boy: Thanks guys, it's such an honou……(muffled gargle)
by The phantom tanner March 11, 2019
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carpentar

a kiss-ass out-doer that will do anything to make themself look better than you, but deep down inside they are just a log of shit...with mold on it
Carpentar is such a flamer, i hear he once tried to bone his mother up the bum!
by Pascallion November 6, 2003
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Cambodian Carpenter's Belt

Sexual maneuver whereby the male pulls out just prior to ejaculation, and drains his balls around the woman's waist. He then proceeds to affix lightweight tools that adhere when the payload dries.
Nick: Where'd your hook-up go from last night?
Rick: That bitch was straight blue-collar, so I gave her a Cambodian Carpenter's Belt. I sent that biggums out the door wearing some drill bits and garden twine.
by Gree December 14, 2008
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carpenter

the act of a woman giving a hand job while holding a piece of sandpaper.
"dude! i almost went to the hospital 'cause that bitch tried to give me a carpenter"
by stoak May 8, 2010
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Cambodian Carpenter's Belt

Sexual maneuver whereby the male pulls out just prior to ejaculation, and drains his balls around the woman's waist. He then proceeds to affix lightweight tools that adhere when the payload dries.
Nick: Where'd your hook-up go from last night?
Rick: That bitch was straight blue-collar, so I gave her a Cambodian Carpenter's Belt. I sent that biggums out the door wearing some drill bits and garden twine.
by Gree December 14, 2008
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Carpenterly

To have skills that would do one well as a carpenter
but ya i wouldn't make that too much effort and i'm not carpenterly-inclined
by Joe the Carpenter December 19, 2008
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Carpenter Shaming

Job shaming someone like the guy from Cosby Show. "Is Bob rich?" No, he's a poor carpenter and not nearly as sophisticated as us rich lawyers!" Or
So, I hear your a carpenter now. *cough* (when you want to put someone down")
I hear they're carpenter shaming the new hire.
by Paul Axlerod November 27, 2019
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