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jesus perez

Jesus Perez is a guy who does not like to be called the real Jesus only jesus. He is really kind and will always be by your side. He might not be attractive but does have girls behind him. He is very smart and will not just help u but will give u answers. He will always try to make u smile and will always cheer u up.
Jesus: Hey there need some help
Kiesha: Yes
Jesus: I will not help u I will give u the answers
Kiesha: Thnx
Jesus: NP

Jesus Perez is smart
by JP 30071 October 17, 2020
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Plastic Jesus

A term used to describe someone puts on the facade of being holy when, in fact, they are not.
Yeah, he acts like he's offended by people's foul language, but he's not all that either because he's really just plastic Jesus.
by Ngstfld June 30, 2018
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banana jesus

the god of fun and fruit and has never turns down a good time with freinds and hot chicks.
damn, banana jesus gots the moves!!
by bananajesus2018 September 21, 2017
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Jesus Crackers

Communion bread. Only funnier and truer. Best used in the context of satirizing Christianity and in humoring the physical appearance of the bread.
Friend: "I went to church today"
Friend 2: "Ouu what'd you do?"
Friend: "We heard a homily and prayed and received communion!"
Friend 2: "yOu mEan yOu aTe jEsuS cRackErs"
by the Dan Dan that Can Can April 13, 2020
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Twink Jesus

Person 1:"Hey do you know twink Jesus?"
Person 2: "Hell yea! I love Troye Sivan
by Troyesleftnutt June 17, 2018
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Jesus Shield

People who proselytize and wave Jesus' name around when they are directly or indirectly accused of unethical or otherwise morally hazardous behavior.
Wow - what's up with Ted! All I called out was that I thought his cheating on his wife was not cool and he pulled out his Jesus Shield!
by RoSatanSF October 15, 2013
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jesus hong

You know, I met Jesus in there, he is Chinese, and his last name is Hong, he has no idea where people got the Christ thing from. (Jesus Hong)
by ChubbyUnicorn July 13, 2017
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