Matt Simon

Commonly known as “Molly Matt”(because he loves molly his gfs name), he’s the sweetest boy who would never touch drugs or alcohol. NEVER. He respects the law and would never do something like public urination. Matt hates fraternities and believes they are no fun and doesn’t want anything to do with partying. He also LOVES black people.

Man1: “Dude it’s Matt Simon!”
Man:2 “I know people call him Molly Matt because he just loves his gf”
Man1: “Wait I thought it was because he took Molly?”
Man2: “Mchale shut the fuck up.”

by OGMiceman February 12, 2024

Simon Cowell

❌

Simon Cowell is ❌

by iminhellplshelpahhh March 15, 2025

Simon

A squid, Someone who follows little girls around trying to get a date.

Person 1: "Omg you are such a Simon"

Person 2: "Ok, I admit I like little girls

by My_Big_Wrinkly_Brain January 30, 2024

National throw Simon Day

On October 7 its National throw Simon day meaning anybody named Simon can be thrown into the atmosphere.

You: Hey Simon .
Simon : What?
You: (Throws Simon into the atmosphere)
You: Happy National throw Simon day everyone!

by Daleym October 6, 2022

Simon's Ankles

The weakest set of ankles in known existence. Collapse instantly under the slightest strain or duress. Unable to support a fully grown human being any more than 2 poorly constructed souffles

Did you see that man in-explicitly collapse upon himself? He must have "Simon's Ankles"!

by BoxerBoyBronson December 16, 2021

Simon

Simon is a man with a fairly average sized cock. Often women see Simon as a kind of a weird person, leaving Simon to settle for his American buddy Harley who lives in 'massivetwoshits' (massachusettes) their romantic chemistry is often staggering. Often leaving the average unisex couple jealous of their passionate love making. Simon is a femine man who can often be slightly racist but that's nothing compared to his love for a Subaru brz. Simon is pittied for liking the brz for obvious reasons... (it's fucking slow) but no matter how weird he may be, he is always loved by the hoe-mies. Show your local Simon some love & if socially acceptable, proceed to make love to him passionately.

Shut up, 'Simon'
That is one massive 'Simon'
'Simon' sexualizes his homies

by Zimcox November 21, 2021

Simon lynch

Pub owner from Deeping

Used to be a chef

Simon Lynch serves beer

by anonymous July 26, 2024