Footlong

How Europeans think Americans measure things

British dude 1: bro my teacher said use American measurements, but I don't know that shit since everyone else uses fucking metric, America is a cunt.
British dude 2: hey I got you fam, they use footlongs. One foot is one footlong.
British dude 1: mate, thanks

by I hate your life for you August 6, 2021

FootlongHades42

A very cool

FootlongHades42 is very

by Paul .Z October 11, 2021

Footlong salad

A sexual thing

Bro, that footlong salad is such a sexual thing.

by Meeef roast March 14, 2024

Mustard Footlong

oh boy boy
hot a dog beats and weanie steamy nothing hot
mustard footlong up little dingle stadium oughta a this dong jazz
is good weaner now lookin a that

Who asked? Mustard Footlong didn't.

by anonymous December 18, 2020

Filthy Footlong

A possibly world-record shattering turd that measures from end to end, at the very least, 12 inches.

Samantha: "Why were you laughing so hard in the bathroom?"
Barbara: "Holy shit, bitch. I just made a filthy footlong in there. I haven't flushed it yet - you wanna see?"
Samantha: "Hell no, that's disgusting! By the way, why the fuck is your name Barbara?"

by anonguy654280 February 20, 2022

Florida footlong fountain

A 2 part level 4 sex move in which a foot long baby crocodile is wedged into a girl's vagina and turned into a piss fountain. Once satisfied the crocodile will be cooked over an open flame and consumed.

Bertha ripped a mean Florida footlong fountain last night. Best damn crocodile I ever eaten.

by Farmermann23 October 12, 2023

Sausage footlong baconator

The very rare occasion that a fat hog is crossing the road and you just so happen to be riding a motorcycle. You would have to yell “sausage footlong baconator” right before you complete strike and brutally murder the hog

“Sausage footlong baconator”
🐖💀

by Lukard_oh November 6, 2025