ass pests

Anything living that does not belong in your ass, including insects, arachnids or snakes.

My father tended to seek out the higher-end and therefore very well-maintained campgrounds that would be less likely to have ass pests.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 18, 2021

Ass Reaper

A God of the Prostate
Ever see the brown stuff smeared all over the walls in that one Seven-Eleven bathroom? He was there...
Ever seen a toilet shattered to the point of unrecognition? He was there...
Ever seen a clog that can't be flushed, like one that is as tall as the toilet tank? He was there...
Ever late to work because of a sudden need to poo? He is there...
Ever late to class because all of the toilet paper is gone in the stall? He was there...
Don't challenge the one who reaps, because he always wins.

Boss: WHY WERE YOU LATE AGAIN?!

Worker: Man I had the nastiest shits today, all I had was an AMPM burrito.

Boss: Oh.. The Ass Reaper has strucketh once again!

by Worcestersh1re December 2, 2022

ass blasting bitchaloid

Something that markiplier said in a video

My sister said this is going to be an ass blasting bitchaloid

by Derpymcsir April 5, 2016

Ass Jihad

An ass jihad is a horrible event where a person goes to a bathroom -- usually one in public -- and takes a giant shit that's so rotten, vile, and putrid that the place smells like a holocaust for hours.

Somebody pulled an ass jihad in the bathroom at work. I had to go into the next building to shit.

by Spanky the Cockmonkey March 10, 2008

ass tortilla

The art of waking up after sleeping off a long night or day of balls deep consensual sex and then spreading your ladys ass cheeks wide and tongue fucking and sucking her asshole.

Me and my girl fucked for hours. We finally passed out and slept for who knows how long. When I woke up, I was hard as a rock again and got me my ass tortilla from her. Once she was sucked and licked clean I decided to cornhole her. I deposited my load deep in her turd canal.

by The Cornhole King January 19, 2005

ass crackle plop

a series of short explosive farts (simular to the sound of a pack of Black Cats going off) followed by a spray of shit.

This usually occurs when you are taking medication that makes your shit pastie. The fart can only get through the shit in small, quick bursts. The shit that comes out is the result of these tiny explosions and create shit spray marks.

damn, ne-gro, you got that ass crackle plop all over my toilet and shit.

by Matthew February 2, 2004

ass-sexual

A person who is only sexually interested in butt fucking, regardless of gender.

Bradley: So wait your Gay?

Pastor Cody: No. I'm ass-sexual. I once went a week without butt fucking and I tried to kill myself.

-Average Dicks Web Series (Episode 4 - Extreme Drifting)

by VinceVaghnrox97 January 22, 2016