Turkey Purist

A self absorbed person who turkey hunts. Screams like a Neanderthal running through the woods for fifteen minutes after shooting a turkey. Makes sure to let everyone know they’re the best at turkey hunting. Essentially the “crossfit” group of turkey hunting.

Did you see that Turkey Purist video his turkey kill in selfie mode again? He made sure to let you know he smoked his cigar for thirty minutes after his “mystical experience in the woods” too.

by Bushwhacker1 April 26, 2023

Turkey towel

A hit of lsd.

Somebody get my turkey towel so I can go find my hand sandwich.

by Snake trap January 17, 2018

Turkeys on the table

This means it's time to go, like on Thanksgiving when the turkeys on the table it's time to eat. The term can be to tell someone to hurry up, and get their ass in gear. Also can mean you have a chance to win a game or a chance to get get your freak on with some smokin hot bitch.

With 10 seconds left in the game, the turkeys on the table for the Steelers with the ball on the goal line.

by TV CARv March 20, 2010

Tickle the Turkey

another term for masturbation.
nobody uses it but i invented it.

"Holy shit, he was tickling his turkey in public and this one lady was watching and taking the meat out of her pink taco." whispered Jane. "To tickle the turkey in public is just plain ass weird," replied her friend.

by saltyboiwholivesinthesaltysea February 3, 2018

Turkey Sammy

When you’ve been married for so long that you don’t have to use a code word but you still do.

Turkey Sammy!!!

We did pretty good this week, let’s Turkey Sammy.

by One of the pack December 10, 2021

bald turkey

When your vag is bald, like a plucked turkey.

That's a lovely bald turkey... hoe

by theburmmachine November 30, 2015

Turkey Paralysis

Normally experienced after Thanksgiving and/or Christmas dinners. A person experiences turkey paralysis after they have consumed an excessive amount of food. This ultimately leads the body into a state of paralysis from being so full and the rest of the evening is normally spent being unable to move on the couch.

Ryan: "How was your Christmas dinner last night?"
Cody: "Way too much food... I entered a state of turkey paralysis. I couldn't move after dinner."

by CP1991 April 4, 2016