monkey ass

The resultant condition from prolonged periods of poor personal hygiene (i.e. lack of showering) and physical activity leading to an uncomfortable, sweaty, red burning ass reminiscent of a large, red and bulbous monkey's ass which has been dragged through the sand and dirt all day and appears quite painful.
(See the latin, rectus sebaceous primatus)

Dude I gotta take a shower - I got some wicked monkey ass!

by zagnut February 21, 2005

Monkey House

After anal fisting, the man or woman pulls out their hand and flings poo at their partner, mimicking the animals at the Monkey House at the Zoo.

After a rousing bout of ass-fisting, he pulled his hand out and Monkey Housed her.

by Cincy Chili Dog June 10, 2008

Monkey Tits

An insult aimed at someone with less than average IQ, coolness factor, or Bodily Odor (in this case, more than average). Can also be used in place of a forgotten name.

Hey monkey tits, take a shower! You smell like a bag of smashed assholes.

Hey.... uh... Monkey Tits, get me a fucking beer before I hit you with a jizz rocket.

by the_guy January 13, 2005

monkey dick

Breakfast sausage or sausage links. This term is used in military chow halls and prisons.

Let's cook eggs and monkey dicks for breakfast.

by Atomic Johnny March 30, 2005

monkey bar

(verb) to hold on to one relationship until another is firmly in hand.

Whiny Guy: Lisa cheated on me with James! And now they're going out!
Friend: Wasn't she going out with Adam when you started hooking up with her?
Whiny Guy: Well yeah, but they were on the rocks anyway.
Friend: She always monkey bars her way through boyfriends. You should have seen this coming a mile away, loser.

by lizz612 December 22, 2005

Monkey Face

A person who has at least two of the following traits; Upturned nose with nostrils pointing out at the world like two empty canons. Sloped and furrowed brow. Big monkey lips, teeth, and jaw.

Shanna Collins from CBS's "Swingtown" has a classic Monkey Face.

by jlkid March 11, 2010

monkey in the middle

The monkey in the middle is the person that is in the middle of two fighting sides. This person is friends with both arguing sides and wants to stay neutral but is eventually dragged into the fight, and one of the fighting sides become mad at them.

I feel bad for John, he just wants to have fun and not get involved in drama but he always becomes the monkey in the middle.

by Meijer's! January 15, 2007