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Sperm web

Noun. It is a phenomenon that happens when a girl is being “courted” by a guy and they are about to get serious and then suddenly all of her exes, hoes, or random men start showing up trying to earn her affection. It’s as if all men are subconsciously connected through this sperm web.
“Bruh my ex boyfriend just texted me he misses me!” “Oh my god, ugh it must be the sperm web”
by Lolbrono January 16, 2023
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Sperm-Whaling

An entry level sex act designed to denigrate a female while qualifying as a popular double points finishing move for men. To participate in Sperm-Whaling, a man begins by gently ejaculating into a females mouth so as not to arouse her suspicion. Then, without warning, the male quickly yanks the back of the females hair in a downward motion so as to elicit a surprise factor while simultaneously orienting her mouth toward the sky. A brisk gut punch from the male finishes the maneuver as it sends his sperm shooting out skyward from her mouth just like a whale clearing its blowhole when surfacing.
Hey bro, Do you see that stuff on the ceiling? I had Becky over last night and I went Sperm-Whaling!
by Testeclease January 27, 2023
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Sperm-Whaling

An entry level sex act designed to denigrate a female while qualifying as a popular double points finishing move for men. To participate in Sperm-Whaling, a man begins by gently ejaculating into a females mouth so as not to arouse her suspicion. Then, without warning, the male quickly yanks the back of the females hair in a downward motion so as to elicit a surprise factor while simultaneously orienting her mouth toward the sky. A brisk gut punch from the male finishes the maneuver as it sends his sperm shooting out skyward from her mouth just like a whale clearing its blowhole when surfacing.
Hey bro, Do you see that stuff on the ceiling? I had Becky over last night and I went Sperm-Whaling!
by Testeclease January 27, 2023
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Sperm Slots

When you spank your hog so you nut out your current child in hopes for a better one
“Yo Brian, I just hit up the sperm slots so I don’t have a retarded ass kid”
by TwinArchive October 1, 2025
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sperm cramps

something men experience that is comparable to periods. poor guys.
‘my girl complaining about her period cramps, while i got sperm cramps’ - dom

‘yeah they’re soooo painful’ - x
by meeeowww3 November 7, 2025
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Sperm and slide

A sex act where the male ejaculates onto the floor in massive loads, and the partner uses this as a slip and slide
Man: hey I’m about to ejaculate
Partner: do it on the floor so we can have a sperm and slide
by Sexyboy2468 March 25, 2025
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