Sperm Locked

Sperm Locked, unspoken binding contract in which two people have engaged in intercourse that results in the birth of a child. Can be positive or negative according to your #affectionship.

Positive
Stacey “I’m pregnant Dave”
Dave “You’re Sperm Locked?”
Stacey “I am”
Dave “Will you marry me?”
(Happily Married)

Negative
Stacey “I’m pregnant Dave”
Dave “You’re Sperm Locked?!”
Stacey “I am”
Dave “Fuck”

(Dave never returned)

by Diddybiddie September 24, 2023

Sperm Cocktail

An act of more than one gentleman ejaculating in the same young lady during the same encounter, usually vaginally.

Often used to express an intention to frustrate said young lady's ability to identify the father if she conceives.

Implies an expectation or intention to impregnate said young lady while avoiding responsibility.

More casually, describes the accumulated ejaculate of multiple gentlemen in a young lady's mouth before she swallows it.

Hey, let's try to give Judy a sperm cocktail so she can't come after any of us for child support.

Don't make a sound while you're inside Suzy, or she'll take off her blindfold and realize we're giving her a sperm cocktail.

Before I finish with Beth and pass her to you, you all need to promise to contribute to her sperm cocktail so I'm not on the hook by myself.

Wait until we have all finished, Peggy, then swish it around before you swallow your sperm cocktail.

by Cock-sure Fellow January 3, 2025

Zero Sperm September

Basically the same exact thing as No Nut November, but during September instead of November. I don’t know why I made this, but I did.

Derrick: “Heyo! Did you fail Zero Sperm September yet?
Andy: “Nope! Still going strong!”

by criticalcounterpart August 20, 2023

Sperm Dragon

When you bend a chick over and engage in intercourse so hard that when the man finishes the cum shoots out her nose….expert level move

You seen Amanda with the fat ass. I’m gonna turn that trick into a sperm dragon

by Askjkjkjklol March 31, 2022

Sperm Bank Reject

Someone that for some reason, somehow ended up on this world, after being put on the "rejected sperm" shelf in the spermbank and is now a burden to everyones life.

Dan: "Jesus Christ, Richard, you're a fucking sperm bank reject. The nurses should have thrown your dads sperm out right away instead of putting it on a shelf. You're probably as ugly and brain-damaged as he was."

Richard: "..."

by John_is_not_a_homophobe August 17, 2021

sperm miser

An ancient mystical and evil creature of orc decent who collects the seamen of the men he slaugters and stores it in a secret cave where he uses it to make potions to summon antient Mongolian warriors to help him conquer the earth, no one knows exactly where these caves are but there believed to be located in the Mediterranean mountain region of Eurasia, but be warned if anyone ever finds this cave they must travel with caution as the sperm miser is know to attack trespassers with an oaken cane.

Children cringe as their parents warn them about the evil sperm miser - (child and parent convo)

Mom what's a sperm miser ? (Mother replys) Jimmy never go near a sperm miser or he'll steal your cum and beat you.

by Shrek fucker January 22, 2016

sperm recepticle

A misspelling of "sperm receptacle", promulgated by illiterates.

According to sperm.blog "Sperm receptacles, also known as spermathecae, are structures found in female organisms used to store and receive sperm during sexual reproduction. Sperm receptacles are specialized structures in female animals that receive and store sperm from male partners for later fertilization of their eggs. These structures have evolved in a variety of shapes and sizes, ranging from pouches to ducts to sacs, depending on the species."

That much is real. There is, however, no such word as "sperm recepticle".

One more reason why illiterates should not be permitted to breed.

by bitchuck December 14, 2024