Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
by Catamount June 21, 2008
Get the SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermimug. Oral sex with deep throat. A womans answer to the mustache ride. Like a neck rub but for the inside.
by Duckie45895 June 1, 2016
Get the throat rubmug. When you’re forced to jerk off without the aid of lubrication due to the lack of amenities in a cheap hotel while traveling.
After staring at the hot stewardess for three hours on my flight today I had to rub one out with no delay. My cheap hotel had no lubrication so I had to perform a Memphis Dry Rub just to release the poison. Fortunately there was a 7-11 nearby, so round two was much more pleasant.
by Arc A. Noodle September 7, 2021
Get the Memphis Dry Rubmug. 
if u wanna buy, sell, r trade with someone n they refuse the deal in other words don't wanna let go of what they r holding you tell them to rub it on their chest basically saying to just keep it in their possession n caressing it on their chest talking bout "ill never let u go" in other words "rub it all over ur chest you can keep it"
hey are u still selling ur car? no i decided to keep it im not selling it no more..... whatever, rub it on your chest u wer asking too much anyways
by the seeker1382 December 16, 2023
Get the rub it on your chestmug. lather each other (you and your partner) up in mayonnaise and spank each other while engaging in amazing sex
Person 1: Hey, I wanna try something new today..
Person 2: What did you have in mind??
Person 1: I wanted to try Rub it on like a jar of mayonnaise today..
Person 2: I'll get the mayonnaise!
Person 2: What did you have in mind??
Person 1: I wanted to try Rub it on like a jar of mayonnaise today..
Person 2: I'll get the mayonnaise!
by MAYONNAISE RUBBER 69 June 11, 2018
Get the Rub it on like a jar of mayonnaisemug. Choosing to rub a cat exclusively with your left hand, reserving the right hand for touching everything else. Mainly useful for people avoiding allergies.
by alpacasaurusrex April 11, 2015
Get the Indian Cat Rubmug.