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Panic Wank

A game played by terribly bored teenagers. The typical scenario involves being alone in one's room, erection in hand. The participant then shouts in order to call the attention of someone they would rather not be masturbating infront of: the most common example being the mother. The player then attempts to bring himself to climax and clean up before the mother, or other, enters the room to see what they were wanted for.
A rainy day in middle class English suburbia. One nervous sixteen year old male clutches his erect penis in one hand, Kleenex in the other. He clears his throat, ensuring his voice does not falter.

"MUM!!"

The game of panic wank begins.
by Panic Wanker October 1, 2009
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wank shaft

Description of the shaft of a penis i.e. the bit that is rubbed during masterbation. Used as an insult likening the victim to the penis.
Give me back my wallet wank shaft!
by Honest John May 8, 2004
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Commando wank

Quick and intense self gratification, usually performed spontaneously anywhere, outside or at work. Once aroused by erotic stimuli ie. co worker, billboard model or you just have too...
Arthur became aroused watching the laundry go round, a commando wank was the only answer.
by jazrowjo August 3, 2009
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Air-wank

The gesture of masturbating in the air, invariably male in orientation, and usually expressing a lack of impression or excitement. Often shown with asterisks bracketing indicating action, like so:

*air-wank*

Not to be confused with *air-rub*.
A: I'll bet you five bucks you can't get a date with that fat chick over there.

B: *air-wank* Are you kidding me? I've got a whole cooler full of Ben & Jerry's in the car when the truffles in my pocket run out.
by Mr. Scumbag to you February 18, 2010
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Ball Wanking

Where one man pulls his balls and another man thrusts his penis between them.
I enjoyed ball wanking my boyfriend yesterday, he enjoyed it but boy am i sore.
by sexypoo November 30, 2009
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Pranking and wanking

An english phrase
When you prank call some-one who you have a crush on and you prank them for a week+ and when after you prank them you wank(masterbate) over them
Johnny was pranking and wanking over Sarah

"Hey Dave i keep getting pranked"
"Yeah its probably Eddie pranking and wanking
by Superjordz August 20, 2007
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Wank Bladder

The Tiny bladder that contains sperm. Alledged to only hold enough for around 7 wanks.

7 also being the mystical number of wanks before you hit the "wank barrier"
"I got up to seven wanks tonight but I just couldn't cum no more!...Think I emptied the wank bladder!"

Or:
"I tried to get past seven wanks but hit the wank barrier"
by combatstig March 15, 2009
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