Crud Muffin

A large puffy poop turd

Michelle : Oh Mark I sure did miss your hard dick inside me Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Mark : Oh Michelle I sure did miss your soft pussy YEE! YEE! YEE! (splat) OOPS!
Michelle : OOPS! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?
Mark : Oh nothing just a little Crud Muffin come on let's cuddlefuck!
Michelle : LITTLE IT'S THE SIZE OF A SOFTBALL? You pooped a Crud Muffin on my leg while you was pounding my pussy! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY BED!
Mark : Uh I believe this is our bed and I want to cuddlefuck!
Michelle : Uh we are divorced and this is my bed GET THE FUCK OUT!
Mark : (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : And take your god damn Crud Muffin with you! (splat)
Steve : Hey Mark you look so sexy with that Crud Muffin on your face Mmmm!
Mark : Wow Steve thanks! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : MARK WHY THE HELL IS SOME GUY LICKING YOUR FACE AND RUBBING YOUR COCK!
Mark : I don't know but it feel's kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : GROSS! Im calling the cops!
Steve : You know Mark in prison you can get fucked in the ass and blow Crud Muffins everywhere!
Mark : Wow that sounds kinda nice! (sniff) (sniff)
Michelle : Hello Police two gay guy's broke into my house and there are Crud Muffins everywhere!
Steve : Mmmm! Crud Muffins! (wink)

by SlopNChop November 30, 2018

fud crud

when there is some nasty shit(pussy crust) down in the female area (fanny).

"yo bro, that hoe had some fud crud last night... I could taste it and nearly quorfed"

by john abdhule September 13, 2008

crud muffin

a person who is generally perceived as attractive, but rather than a 'stud' they're 'crud'

david beckham is such a crud muffin

by georgiabeth February 06, 2009

Crud-mandouche

When the act of ass-kissing, or brown nosing ,as it is sometimes called, has become so ridiculously obvious, it's as if the perp has intentionally wrapped toilet paper around his own head, so as to become a human butt hole swab. It is at this time that the butt-smooching offender must forever be christened... Crud-mandouche.

Worker 1: Wow, looks like the boss' son is really crawling up the old keister today. huh?
Worker 2: What a total farken Crud-mandouche!

by Thecrudwhisperer March 30, 2010

Creeping crud

Unknown rash. gunch

I found the creepin crud on my leg was just chicken pox.

by DavidLeeRoth March 05, 2005

crud cutter

When a group of several friends collect their dick cheese, and cut it in with a few lines of coke.

Billy was doing Crud Cutter bumps off the toilet seat lastnight.

by dirstnam October 27, 2017

crud monkey

A generic programmer whose job revolves around create, read, update and delete, aka CRUD

95% of programmers are just useless crud monkeys, dumb crud monkey

by Homeless Chicken December 22, 2022