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iPhone Blindness

An acute condition which renders the sufferer incapable of remembering why he or she unlocked their iPhone, even when this was done as little as one or two seconds previously.

It arises due to the multitude of gleaming white numbers in little red circles presented to the sufferer once the phone is unlocked, indicating suddenly riveting unread emails, thrilling Facebook and Twitter messages, essential weather forecast for tomorrow, exciting app updates, tantalising missed Skype calls, potentially life-changing calendar invites and many, many more, which inevitably cause the sufferer to forget immediately what they were actually supposed to be doing, e.g. making a simple phone call.
She: Why didn't you pay the credit card bill?
He: I was going to but when I looked at my phone, I saw five new emails, which I had to read, and a missed Skype call, which I had to return … and then I forgot what I was supposed to do. Sorry, I think I've got iPhone Blindness.
by Simon2072 February 1, 2013
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night blindness

When you meet a girl under low lit conditions and she looks good but when you see her again in broad day-light she is nasty looking.
Man, she was nasty, I must have had night blindness when I met her.
by Phil Mizas December 27, 2007
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Pussy Blinders

In refrence to some one who is pussy whooped by there girl friend. AKA Cole
by Ryan February 12, 2004
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Thing Blindness

Used when you are looking for some THING that you know is RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU but you can't find it or see it.
Husband: Honey, do you know where my keys are?

Wife: Yes dear, they're on the counter right in front of you.

Husband: I must be suffering from Thing Blindness
by who da hell cares? April 22, 2010
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Toe Blindness Syndrome

When your stomach is so big, you cannot see your toes.
Man, my boss already has TBS - Toe Blindness Syndrome, but he's still eating out of the vending machine.
by bing's wai July 8, 2011
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disclaimer blindness

The temporary blindness or other visual problems that occur from trying to read hardly discernible product disclaimers on TV ads.
I can't see the program for this lingering disclaimer blindness!
by redPooka September 2, 2012
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Maternal Blindness

Truly believing your ugly child is the best looking kid on the planet.
"Sara certainly has maternal blindness with her newest addition that baby is uglier than sin but she keeps bragging about how cute it is what is she thinking?"
by prfctlyflwd March 11, 2013
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