Security plonker

Socially retarded, untrained, Unintelligent, unattractive person often employed to work an unnecessary position.

Look at that security plonker over there, hasnt done an ounce of work all day!

by Locnes November 14, 2016

Im only pulling your plonker

expression used after a practical joke has been played on a fellow subordinate

"Hey Jim... your mother is dead"
"oh my god really....?"
"Nah ...only pulling your plonker"

by Big Jakey T March 17, 2003

Plonker

A British slang term used as an insult meaning idiot. Usually used in an endearing way or when having a joke with someone

Person: you didn’t have to do that you plonker!

by Alex.tay09 July 12, 2019

Plonker

A Plonker is typically some donkey who hangs around alley ways smoking the devils lettuce. He then shags his dad and sucks his toes.

Konrad is such a plonker

by Turnip———-13 April 30, 2021

Poonce

Poonce: The smell of ones butt crack sweat.

It was a hot day at the beach,even after my shower, I could still smell the scent of poonce on my fingers.

by Cdub0627 July 23, 2017

ponce

a male who on occasion participates in strange activities, such as: water skiing and trying on women's shoes. a "ponce" may often be found wearing strange or moth-eaten fur hats, similar to one that 'light speed champion' wears. in response to a cuss from a "ponce", one would most likely say "shut up, gayboy" or "take that shit off your head".

MYLES: i'm thinking i might wear that furry hat out today.
JAMES: you think that will get you bare babes, init..that's so ponce.
MYLES: shut up, gay boy.
JAMES: at least i don't try on girls' shoes.

by greyfrust August 25, 2009

ponce

a person who hangs around other poeple scoialy and never pays his way ie gets people to buy him drinks food etc but never returns the favour.

thats the 5th pint ive bought that cunt Dave hes such a ponce.

by grumpyboy September 26, 2005