Skip to main content

Murphy's Law of Gambling

"You can patronize the slots till Doomsday or buy any number of scratch-off tickets and never gain any significant winnings, but then just as soon as you stop playing, the very next player will win big."
Many an addicted gamer believes in Murphy's Law of Gambling, even though it is indeed :"all chance" and thus seldom actually works out that way.
by QuacksO September 12, 2019
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Gambling mug.

Murphy's Law of Snoring

"Your slumber-partner will snooze silently during periods that you're up and away from the boudoir, but then he will totally 'saw logs' whenever you're actually cohabitating with him --- and wanting to get some shut-eye --- in the same bed."
Perhaps many instances of Murphy's Law of Snoring stem from the snorer's needing more space to "spread out", which he would have whenever he has the whole bed to himself; being more cramped can restrict air-passages and so on..
by QuacksO September 29, 2019
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Snoring mug.

Murphy’s law

When a woman give a fellatio to a man after consuming potential barf material and end up puking on the man’s shaft
« Man , Jessica showed me what Murphy’s law was last night »
by Canadiah December 12, 2019
mugGet the Murphy’s law mug.

Murphy's Law

1. anything than can go wrong, will go wrong
2. if there's multiple way something will go wrong, it'll go wrong in the worst way possible
3. if you'll thought of 4 ways the thing will go wrong, it'll go wrong in the 5th way
4. if you try to play some video games in secret, urmom will find out
my mom found me out playing games thanks to the murphy's law
by missingno_kekw March 7, 2022
mugGet the Murphy's Law mug.

Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable

"You can struggle for hours to get bearably comfortable --- i.e., warm enough, free of aches, etc. --- but then just as soon as you actually DO succeed in getting comfortably 'settled in' at long last, something unavoidable will come up dat will force you to relinquish said comfy position to go and tackle some disagreeable physical activity which will cause you to get chilly again, experience more bodily pain, etc."
Two "sister" examples of Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable would be "Murphy's Law of Falling Asleep" (i.e., you can struggle for half the night or more to fall asleep, but then immediately after you finally drift off, someone or something comes along to wake you up again) and "Murphy's Law of Personal Comfort" (i.e., however comfortable you become will be in direct inverse proportion to da comfort of others in your vicinity; for example, da nearer you sit to a heater/air-conditioning duct, da more you will block da flow of said "moderated" air, and so while YOU YOURSELF may indeed feel more-tolerably warmer/cooler, EVERYONE ELSE in da room will feel even more uncomfortable than you would have if you'd sat a more-reasonable distance from said climate-control orifice. Or if you recline your seat on a public-transportation vehicle, said tilted-backwards back-rest will encroach on da extremely-limited "personal space" in front of da passenger seated behind you).
by QuacksO February 1, 2023
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Getting Comfortable mug.

Murphy's Law of Bolt-Loosening

"You can heave and strain on da wrench till Doomsday and never get a stubborn bolt loosened, but then just as soon as you ask a stronger --- and probably very busy himself --- person to come and help, DAT'S when da blasted bolt actually WILL yield, either when you give a final demonstrative yank on da wrench to show da second person how supposedly stuck da bolt is, or when he himself hauls back on da wrench and said previously-cranky bolt unscrews with little effort on his part, indicating dat your OWN last tug actually HAD cracked it free after all, and so if you had 'just given it one more go' yourself, you actually COULD have gotten da bolt out on your own, without having to interrupt your now-ears-smokingly-annoyed-at-being-needlessly-called-away colleague in da first place."
I wonder if da inventor of da impact wrench had originally felt prompted to do so due to his having frequently encountered Murphy's Law of Bolt-Loosening???
by QuacksO February 13, 2023
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Bolt-Loosening mug.
Da "hanged if you do and hanged if you don't" fact-of-life irony regarding how a sizeable sector of da female populous treats any dude who shows interest in them romantically --- i.e., if a guy gets da idea from a gal's attitude/behavior towards him dat he should just mind his own business and not court her, she'll bawl and blubber dat he is making her feel ignored and unvalued. Yet if he then hastily begins persuing her in da naive belief dat this is what she wants, she'll go "bawlin' and blubberin" to da COPS and tearfully accuse him of harassing her! Can't win... :P
I always tread super-carefully when approaching a new lady for companionship or intimacy --- seems like Murphy's Law of Attentiveness is often lurking just around da corner to pounce on me and give me undeserved grief!
by QuacksO March 22, 2023
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Attentiveness mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email