bar furniture

Stools; a slightly cryptic way to talk about poop in polite company.

Man, I need to eat more fiber. I haven't seen bar furniture in days.

Dude, you should go shower, you totally smell like bar furniture.

by chinesedentist December 15, 2010

Furniture Orgasm

A furniture orgasm is when a sales person gets an orgasm from new furniture and/or new fabrics that they receive from furniture manufactures.

Susan and Brendon both had furniture orgasms when they saw the new furniture and fabric that was going to be put on the showroom floor.

by TheFurnitureGal May 21, 2011

move furniture

To have sex with a large woman.

"Did you move furniture last night?"

"Yeah, I fucked a human couch."

by leRayMoo September 19, 2014

licking furniture

The act of oral sex between two females.

Lori really likes when Jess licks her furniture.

Both of them enjoy licking furniture.

by tes272 August 14, 2014

furniture salesperson

A poor bastard who sales furniture, lamps, recliners and bedding. One who lies to people about their taste in home furnishings. A person who listens to constant whinning about prices, listens to rambling about a house decore they don't give a shit about. When this simpleton finally closes the sale the buyer immediately begins to complain about the product.
A furniture salesperson might have to view buggars on the bottom of a recliner brought in for repair, might be exposed to the piss on mattress sent back to the store.
The furniture salesperson is always nice at work and a real ass hole at home. They have held as long as they can!

customer= JUST LOOKING!
furniture Salesperson- can I help you find something
customer- do you have a floral camel back sofa up on legs, maybe one you repoed. My credit ain't so good. Do you guys have 12 month same as cash?
furniture Salesperson- No we only sale new furniture, have you tried the flea market or a yard sale?

by mannman November 10, 2009

moving furniture

A highly developed metaphor used to describe the act of consuming alcohol. Used as code during school hours when one wants to be secretive about performing this act. Sometimes includes the use of the dolly, or beer bong, a device designed for the faster movement of furniture. One can either move chairs, couches, or king sized beds when referring to the amount of furniture moved.

Tom was moving furniture last night, which resulted in his sore back this morning.

Bmac tried to move a king sized bed and got completely shiavoed.

by NA123 July 20, 2008

moving furniture

To have phone sex.

"Ayo megan what you do last night?"
"Dude i was moving furniture all night im so tired."

by so cool dude May 9, 2009