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birthday 

The best occasion of the year, because for example you could get free money on your birthday, you could get a free car on your birthday, etc.. Basically, one of your birthdays could be the best day of your life, just because of a good event happening for free.
I want to go to a strip club on my 21st birthday and ask for a free lap dance that day just because that day would be my birthday!
birthday by Twight0931 March 18, 2021

Birthday 

Every year that passes your one year closer to death’s doorstep.

In a way we are all slowly dying
Birthday by SeagullGod July 3, 2019

Birthday 

The day that your mom got sick of you and pooped u out
Joe: I HATE MY MOM!
Sally: Why?
Joe: SHE PUSHED ME OUT A DAY AFTER MY BIRTHDAY
Birthday by P00pc0rn October 29, 2019

Birthday 

Today's the day
That your mom's vag was on display
Your fat fuck-face slipped

I went to CVS and bought the first card I saw
It said congrats on that Torah reading
Fucking mazel tov
Birthday by Alex+Jaz October 8, 2019

birthday 

the day you were born. dont expect to have a birthday party after you turn 13. after that, all you get is a card.
Person 1:happy 13th birthday, jessie!

You: F*uck off
birthday by AB kat girl 12 June 1, 2016