An
ex-boyfriend archetype defined by the thrill of emotional whiplash and the fine
art of saying one thing while doing another. Often spotted keeping his phone guarded like a national secret, he’s the kind of guy who’ll make you question if his favourite
words are “its complicated” or just “my mom wouldn't approve.”
Fahad’s hobbies include: showing up at 2 a.m. for “quality time” only when he’s
bored, comparing you to the latest instagram influencer (namely Madison
Beer), and leaving you feeling like you need to consult a mirror. He’s got a back pocket full of excuses for why he “can’t commit” yet, a line or two about how “it’s
hard to make things work,” and a habit of disappearing to avoid having any in-person conversations. The last thing he offered willingly? A backhanded compliment.
Common Symptoms of Fahad-Exposure:
Lowered phone privileges
Late-night “
hey” texts
A sudden appreciation for your reflection on closure, but no commitment to actually giving it
Comparing you to
literally anyone in a way that’ll make you
cringeIn conclusion: Save yourself the 3 a.m. overthinking, and leave the Fahad's to keep their commitment issues safely tucked behind their screen locks.
“Oh, he ditched the talk again? Sounds like you’ve been Fahad-
ed. Remember, he’s the kind of guy who’
ll tell you he issues you but can’t manage an ‘I love you’ back.”