Mattjoo 

a very angered and cheap young man. will buy you a small mcflurry if he owes you $5. he likes black girls and has very bad social skills especially on the phone.

kyle: "heyy.. ummm what are you doing?"
jerrod: "just sitting at my house"
kyle:"well.... can.. i come... over?
jerrod: kyle stop being a fucking mattjoo and learn how to talk to people."

"hey you can just buy me a mcflurry instead of paying the $5 you owe me." ok ummm can i have.. a small mcflurry? "wow way to be a fucking mattjoo and buy me a $2 mcflurry."

Mattjoo by dr. chongs assistant December 7, 2009

Mattjoo 

When you have interracial sex while constantly interrupting with akward phrases like "sooo, how does it feel?" and "um, should i go harder? Softer?" You then finish by writing about your experience in the school newspaper.

Matt:"hey, am I doing OK?"
Erin:"matt, can you please just shut up and pink sock me?"
Matt:"well, I guess, but what if-"
*Erin puts bag over Matt's head*

Mattjoo

Mattjoo by dr. chong December 9, 2009

Mattoon 

The armpit of Hell which is set in rural Illinois

Im from Mattoon, Illinois.

Im sorry to hear that.

Mattoon by altosax88 July 10, 2008

mattpoopsalot1 

a person who keeps using !urban in a discord server to find weird shit to the dismay of everyone else.

A: Bruh this mattpoopsalot1 just urbaned "Bathroom Battleship"
B: Why did he do that, this guy is super weird

A: He also urbaned "Cold Lunch"
B: I don't even want to know what that means. Thanks for warning me man.

mattpoopsalot1 by Hey It's Me Goku! July 13, 2022

mattjob 

The propensity for an individual to use the number 69 in any and all situations possible.

Wow, does he know any other number besides “69”?That guy is a real mattjob.

mattjob by DutchIV March 23, 2021

Mattpoon 

A term used to describe a male coxswain in the sport of rowing who usually wears a butt plug and has frequent voice cracks.

Person 1: Hey did you see that coxswain when they were taking out the boat?

Person 2: Oh yeah! The one with the voice crack LOL? “unstrAAAAp!”

Person 1: That guy is such a mattpoon man! I swear I saw a butt plug in his ass too!

Mattpoon by BigGangstaVibez June 13, 2021

Mattoon, Illinois 

The pit of hell that is filled with redneck hillbillies that love going to Cracker Barrel and putting out there confederate flags too, the kids are also high on meth and are toxic and want to fight eachother 30 million fucking times a day.

Wow.. what is that smell? Oh wait.. I’m in Mattoon, Illinois I forgot.

Mattoon, Illinois by berriesandcream8767 September 21, 2021