captan

man with a perfect personality and has a HUMONGOUS PENIS, like 3 foot long

wow he is such a captan

captan by hooni morris August 9, 2017

Captan Soil 

One who prematurely ejactulates their pants before sexual intercourse with their desired partner

Olivia:This is the longest you have ever lasted during sex
Reese:I know, I'm Captan Soil

Captan Soil by The brad of chads March 25, 2021

Captain Vape 

Superhero who vapes all the time and gets into trouble with the law and anti vape communities/extremists

The main protagonist of his own comic book series.

Invented by dr J

Captain vape is the illest superhero of the modern day era, puts every other hero to shame

Girl 1: omfg I’m soooo into comics now I need a good read

Guy 1: you should read captain vape?

Girl 1: wtf is that??! It sounds silly

Guy 1: just trust me, it’s worth the read, super entertaining

Girl 1: uh ok, I guess

*finishes reading*

Girl 1: ZOMG I LAVVVVV CAPTAIN VAPE!! He’s the greatest superhero of all time!!!!!!!!!!

Captain Vape by SavesomepU$$y4therestofUS January 27, 2022

Captain Twistie

Captain Twistie is a Revenant perceived as a dysphoric entity that pervades your consciousness. A powerful negative energy that's never far off.

Captain Twistie haunted your waking dreams.

Captain Twistie by Shougo February 5, 2022

Captain Ganja 

Famous pirate radio announcer who ran Radio Free Euphoria. His programs were aimed at reforming marijuana use laws and were often laced with great psychedelic rock music and humor.

For a while, WBCQ used to air both old and new programs from Captain Ganja.

Captain Ganja by pentozali November 27, 2006

Captain Kangaroo 

1 of the longest running children's TV shows, 1st episode Oct. 3, 1955. Bob Keeshan starred as Captain Kangaroo & at age 29 he dyed his hair gray to appear more "grandfatherly". His sidekick Mr. Green Jeans (he did wear green jeans overalls!) was played by Hugh Brannum. A few of the main characters were Mr. Moose, Mr. Rabbit, & Grandfather clock.

Captain Kangaroo was so popular & many, many kids watched it & were highly entertained; a great show!

Captain Kangaroo by Starchylde May 21, 2016

Battle Captain 

In a deployed HQ, there is one person who's job it is to make shit happen. This is the Battle Captain & it is a thankless task, involving many hours without sleep, trying to get more senior officers to stop dicking around & actually concentrate on the task in hand. If everything goes swimmingly, the same senior officers get the credit but if it all goes to ratshit, the Battle Captain has his or her buttons cut off, sword is snapped & they are sat on their horse backwards & paraded out of camp

"This is a rolling goatfuck & we are all going to die" followed by "let's blame the Battle Captain".

Battle Captain by Bumsnorkler March 22, 2019