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ass cactus 

A large, nut-filled turd that hurts the ass upon exit.
Man, that crap hurt! It was a real ass cactus!
ass cactus by Bigsteve February 24, 2005

ass cactus 

Man, my boss was a real ass cactus today!
ass cactus by Jay Young April 19, 2005

cactus ass 

A prickly, fiery burning in the rectal cavity during the act of defecation, as though one were passing a cactus through the colon.
Remind me not to get the Inferno Burger next time we go out to eat; that gave me mad cactus ass.
cactus ass by Dodger of Zion November 19, 2010

Cactus Ass 

The prickly, greasy, "Cactus" feeling in which booty sweat and booboo residue remain in the anus for a lengthy amount of time.
Sometimes when I work out, I end up getting Cactus ass if I don't shower right after!
Cactus Ass by Rat Brown May 29, 2011

Cactus Ass 

When you have diarrhea that's so bad you stand up and can feel your butthole burning. Similar to having a cactus shoved up your ass.
Damn, Steve ate so much Taco Bell he blew up the toilet and is stuck with cactus ass now.
Cactus Ass by ssmithsb19 August 4, 2016

cactus ass 

When you have several hairs in your bum, and you also don't wipe. The hairs began to crust, and become more firm so it pokes around your bum.
Omg Becky, I totally have cactus ass.
cactus ass by Firekrackerinmybutt September 5, 2017