Masturbatory Long Shower

Spending enough time in the shower not necessarily to include the act of sexual masturbation, but to be masturbatorily self indulgent.

"Tony, you are now taking a Masturbatory Long Shower. Turn off the water and cover yourself immediately."

"Holding the shower for an hour. What a wank!"

Masturbatory Long Shower by kariusvega November 15, 2011

Masturbatory TV 

A television show that jerks the viewer around for weeks or years then leaves then unsatisfied.

After watching the series finale of Lost, I realized it was nothing but masturbatory tv

Masturbatory TV by Dannysjokes May 25, 2010

Masturbatory Aid 

Your mother's picture.

Hey Mike, could you please hand me my masturbatory aid...I'm gonna go beat off.

Masturbatory Aid by danielle April 14, 2007

Masturbatory Rape 

When you're checking out an attractive friend or aquaintence's Facebook or other social media account and start masturbating over the more erotic or sexy photos without their consent.

Dude1: "I was flicking through Katie's photos when I noticed one of her shoot pics! I couldn't help but jerk it!"
Dude2: "Too much info brobeans! You'll get done for masturbatory rape!"

Masturbatory Rape by Hoodgotwood August 8, 2016

masturbatory collateral 

An unnecessary piece of printed material (often expensive and elaborate) created solely to inflate someone's corporate ego or impress business partners.

Frank: Did you see that $150K brochure Bob had made?
Bill: Yeah, it didn't even have any decent info in it.
Frank: Just another expensive piece of masturbatory collateral.

masturbatory collateral by Mirmaid Blue December 23, 2009

Masturbatory break 

When you take a break from whatever you're doing to masturbate, most often pausing whatever is being watched on Netflix (alternatively trying to squeeze in a session while the video is buffering).

I was watching Gilmore Girls on Netflix and i managed to catch a masturbatory break because my WiFi sucks.

Masturbatory break by Toblucz December 5, 2016

masturbatory cloaking device 

A blanket given to homeless people allowing them to masturbate in public places

did you see that hobo going at it under his masturbatory cloaking device?

masturbatory cloaking device by Lildeb830 January 27, 2018