Philosopher's Drug 

The "Philosopher's Drug" is the metaphorical drug that affects the mind of those that are philosophical or psychologically analytic. The drug cannot be induced by any means that a regular drug could. The drug is stored within philosophers' cerebral cortex (a part of the brain that partakes in the process of reasoning and logic).

The stored drug is then released between the times 9:00 PM - 12:00 AM. The drug enhances philosophers' ability to reason and allow them to trudge through the most unrealistic debates. The drug wears off at 12:00 AM due to lack of resources. The cerebral cortex then begins to regenerate and store "the Philosopher's Drug" for the next 21 hours, before releasing it in the philosophers' blood stream for another (approximate) three hours the next night.

The Philosopher's Drug only applies to those who are considered philosophical. There is no "self-diagnosis" to having or not having this drug. It takes another mind to determine whether your cerebral cortex produces the drug or not. Once determined, the decision is final.

Mark, stop talking about all this "new age of enlightenment" crap, it's the philosopher's drug kicking in.

Philosopher's Drug by NovaQuoQubaLeo April 30, 2012

Philosopher's Stone 

An ideal that gives hope to the lost. Some would argue that there's an actual scientific formula combining lead and gold... following an array chart, of course. Greek Mythology relates the God "Mercury" somehow in the transformation process, but there isn't much documentation to support his role in the process other than he too was searching.....and I think he had wings on his ankles. The Philosophers Stone was hands down, The best song ever recorded by Van Morrison. The Philosophers stone gives hope to those searching for a home.

"Man, that guy still searching for the Philosopher's stone....."
or "omg, i love this song, Philosopher's Stone" or, "Everytime I hear Philosopher's Stone I think of Larry" or "No need to search for the Philosophers Stone, its been in your pocket all along"

Philosopher's Stone by D.A. Davenport June 28, 2012

Philosopher Kink 

Thirsty for philosophers, commonly Aristotle

Zach: Taylor thinks Aristotle has beautiful eyes?
Molly: Yea he has a philosopher kink.

Philosopher Kink by Molly😘 November 29, 2021

philosopher's hangover 

The general malaise, fatigue, or otherwise hangover-like symptoms that are caused by discussing or debating a philosophical topic too late at night which resulted in you both (a) cognitively never resolving the issue and (b) losing an entire night's worth of sleep attempting to.

Issa, Ali, and Nick all woke up with a really bad philosopher's hangover after spending all night trying to solve the mind-body problem.

philosopher's hangover by n.b. moore September 29, 2017

Philosopher's Nightmare

Any time you're witnessing a conversation spiral downwards and are able to identify the rhetorical techniques participants are fueling the descent with little hope of being able to recover from. Techniques include cherry-picking, generalizing, the moral high ground, appealing to fear or popularity, aggressive (including passive) behavior, explicit bias and persistent rambling with an intent to win over the other side. You're confident any contribution or attempt to help move the conversation forward will be ignored or met with immediate resistance and rejection.

That post on Facebook about gun control became a Philosopher's Nightmare with most of the participants attacking and distracting each other.

Philosopher's Nightmare by Dread Pirate Skeptic November 27, 2022

Philosopher’s Stone

When you take a shit that contains all four elements: fire, earth, water, and air

Bro I just made a fat philosopher’s stone in my toilet

Philosopher’s Stone by anonymous March 1, 2024

Tumblr philosopher 

A Tumblr user who often reblogs or creates posts or pictures which they think are 'deep'. These people often search for more and more followers through promos, or posts constantly in the Facebook 'Tumblr' group.

John: He thinks he's so deep with those quotes about life on his Tumblr.

Jack: I know, what a Tumblr philosopher.

Tumblr philosopher by The Great DV September 8, 2011