My kidnapper ate my traffic 

When you try to think of an excuse

Why am I late? uhhh, uhhhh, my kidnapper ate my traffic

My kidnapper ate my traffic by ascendedbread May 5, 2023

Gyro-Pedo Kidnapper 

Someone who is both an extreme Pedophile and Gyrosexual. A Gyro-pedo kidnapper will kidnap small children, ppaint them green and use them for sexual pleasure until they reach the age of consent. when the children reach the age of consent they will be released deep in the wilderness of Africa where they will learn to mine salt.

Person1: Matthew I'm beginning to think you are a Gyro-Pedo Kidnapper
Matthew: why would you think that?
Person1: because of all the green children chained in your basement with enlarged assholes

Gyro-Pedo Kidnapper by the_Green_Packages September 9, 2019

Diarrhea Kidnapping

A controversial type of kidnapping, originated from Cuba in the 1960s when the non-human entities have later kidnapped humans. They have been spreading fast between 1970-1989 or late 2006-mid 2019. It has discovered by the US Government.

DanTDM, PewDiePie, Justin Bieber, and many notable public figure have been suffered diarrhea kidnapping by object show characters or countryballs.

Diarrhea Kidnapping by yugoslaviamaster65 April 22, 2020

Kidnapping 

Surprise adoption

The greasy man was kidnapping a child

Kidnapping by Reeeeeeeeeeesix4 March 10, 2020

Cocktail Kidnapped 

When you take a walk down the street, pass a friendly neighbor's house, get invited to have a beverage with them, you accept and 90 minutes later, you realize nothing got done but you have a smile on your face.

Sorry I'm late, I went for a walk and got Cocktail Kidnapped at Gary and Viv's along the way.

Cocktail Kidnapped by Smabuda July 29, 2014

help, i've been kidnapped 

What you say when you've been kidnapped, and it totally ruined your day. Like so bad you can't even be scared, and somehow you reach a telephone ti say this phrase.

Cmon man you just had to come and ruin my day. Guess I'll just call 911. Hello? Yes? Yes, help, i've been kidnapped.

help, i've been kidnapped by TheMustardMan47 March 28, 2019

Kidnapping Tissue

its a tissue dipped in alchohol that you use on someone in a street by themself right after saying "wanna taste my tissue?"

Hey i was using a kidnapping tissue to get that kiddo

Kidnapping Tissue by sp4cepants July 28, 2018