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P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties) 

When a female surgically augments her breasts; improving size and mate-ability. Much like P.E.D.'s (Performance Enhancing Drugs), which have the ability to raise a mediocre minor league baseball player's batting average to that of Barry Bonds (P.E.D. poster child), P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties) do the same thing for chicks. You can hear the slow clap in the background --> turning "soft 7's" into "hard 8's".
Hey did you see Jennifer yesterday?

Yeah, from 2 Advil on an ironing board to a dead heat in a zeppelin race.

I'm suspicious of P.E.T.'s (Performance Enhanced Titties).

Suspicious, but thankful.
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I.H.B.P.F.J.A.S.T.M.N.E.Y.N.E.D.M.M.K.Y.A.M.A.I.T.T.R.T.D.I.Y.A.N.W.M.T.Y.A.M.E.O.A.S.D.I.A.I.W.D.W.I.M.Y.W.T. 

“I have brought peace, freedom, justice, and security to my new empire.”
“Your new empire?”
Don’t make me kill you!”
“Anakin, my allegiance is to the Republic, to democracy!”
“If you are not with me, then you are my enemy.”
“Only a Sith deals in absolute. I will do what I must.”
“You will try.”
I’m not retyping that so I’m just gonna copy and paste: I.H.B.P.F.J.A.S.T.M.N.E.Y.N.E.D.M.M.K.Y.A.M.A.I.T.T.R.T.D.I.Y.A.N.W.M.T.Y.A.M.E.O.A.S.D.I.A.I.W.D.W.I.M.Y.W.T.

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z 

When you are bored and have nothing to do, so you type all the letters on the keyboard. From A to Z in space
a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z 

really the ABC's lowercase with a space between them
I'm typing a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z and see what happens (Him being a mad man)
:/

S.T.F.U.Y.U.P.B 

Hey S.T.F.U.Y.U.P.B

s.t.f.u.y.p.o.s.

an aggresive term used mainly online and for texting meaning Shut The Fuck Up You Piece Of Shit!
after multiple text messges, the girl became annoyed and texted the sender back, saying "S.T.F.U.Y.P.O.S.!"
Police Officers Standards and Training. The real name for the police academy.
S.T.U.M.P. officer: "I just got out of P.O.S.T., so I know everything."
P.O.S.T. by California Cop January 3, 2008