Chutching 

The act of masturbating in front of a mirror while crying. The mirror is essential to creating the appropriate levels of self loathing required to bring forth tears.

Simon didn't know whether to use his last tissue to wipe his tears, or the spunk that was sliding down the mirror after his latest chutching session.

Chutching by goatofwisdom July 8, 2011

chutching 

n. to masturbate alone while crying softly

"Is that Ben crying over there?" "no I think he is chutching"

chutching by smelly April 25, 2005

catching wood 

getting a boner.

She was too hot for him; when he saw her cleavage he was already catching wood.

catching wood by coldheart7 October 9, 2009

Muck Chucking 

The act of Jizzing in your hand then throwing it in someone faces

Dave: Our lass loves a bit of Muck Chucking

Muck Chucking by Greg_the_Smeg February 7, 2019

Catching the Crazy Turkey 

A type of sex act performed in bed. It starts with a wild turkey and ends with sex. Somewhere in between, you kill a chicken.

Ryan: You've been catching the crazy turkey over there in Lindsay's bed.
Michael: I don't know what that means.
Geoff: Never have I heard that phrase before.
Lindsay: We kind of go *Insert turkey noise* when we have sex.
Michael: God, don't tell him... What does it mean when someone "catches the crazy turkey"?
Ryan: It's wild. If you don't know, then it's too wild for you.

Catching the Crazy Turkey by Reckz December 13, 2014

Catching strays 

Aiming to insult someone but insulting someone else in the process aswell even if not involved.

If someone is insulting Person A, but also insults Person B, Person B is said to have “caught a stray” (Catching strays)

I cant think of any situations rn sorry

Catching strays by CookedGroceries May 19, 2022

Clutching Bungle 

To be in dire need of a shit

Any chance I can cut in the queue, mate? I'm clutching bungle here!

Clutching Bungle by Mondo Prime April 22, 2009