The woman braces herself facing a
wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the
guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the
guy sprints toward the girl at full
speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead
square in the ass.”
My favorite part of The Landshark is hearing the
iconic theme composed by John Williams. Sometimes, I like to have the other person start a few rooms away so I can hear the entire thing before engaging in mutually satisfying sexual
congress followed by
waffles.