produced exclusively on remote alaskan islands, fart cheese is one of the rarest foods on the planet. milk is extracted from the breasts of caribou, gently heated over an open flame, then subjected to a barrage of farts offered by the rustic villagers who stand in a circle around the cauldron, relentlessly perfuming the milk. it is believed that the #farticules increase enzymatic activity, resulting in more pronounced flavor and slightly wet texture. the best fartcheeses can be aged upwards of a century. very old fartcheeses may taste of urine, glue and porcini mushrooms, and are said to induce hallucinations and a pleasant tingling in the anus.
by trilliam turdsworth June 24, 2024
Get the fartcheese mug.Anu's Touch, stylized as Anustouch, is a permanently closed South Indian restaurant in Boobston, NJ that served what some consider them most innovative Indian dish of the 20th century: dehydrated miniature starfish in a brown curry glaze, garnished with corn. It is said to have tasted primarily of rancid vegetable oil. Other restaurants have attempted to reproduce the dish over the years, but none have succeeded in replicating the secret sauce—anu's touch. The founder, Jaggerwal Fatwinder, now long dead, claimed to have dreamt up the dish while under anaesthesia during the removal of a fat deposit in his forearm.
by trilliam turdsworth May 08, 2023
Get the Anu's Touch mug.i met a girl in tulum who'd been chilling down there for six months already and had fucked like every local dude already. she was dece, but not exactly hot... it was obvious when she started talking about doing some "projects in ithaca" that she was a true fart bottler.
by trilliam turdsworth June 11, 2017
Get the fart bottler mug.When someone blows off a dump and the expulsive force creates a foul shock wave that first travels outward and then bounces off the walls and travels back inward towards the source of the original buttblast. Those who aren’t steady on their feet can be swept up in the ripturd and carried either into the toilet or right up the brownfactory of said ripper.
by trilliam turdsworth January 05, 2023
Get the Ripturd mug.by trilliam turdsworth September 14, 2021
Get the hofart mug.a portmanteau of the words "stink"and "pinkerton."
stink refers to something smelly, namely a fart.
pinkerton refers to a private detective.
thus, a stinkerton is a private detective hired to investigate the origins of a particular rip. the best stinkertons have backgrounds in fartography. if a trained fartographer is present at the scene of a true stink, undoubtedly he/it/they will be able to identify who released the rotten wind.
stink refers to something smelly, namely a fart.
pinkerton refers to a private detective.
thus, a stinkerton is a private detective hired to investigate the origins of a particular rip. the best stinkertons have backgrounds in fartography. if a trained fartographer is present at the scene of a true stink, undoubtedly he/it/they will be able to identify who released the rotten wind.
cadwallader: i lit'rally just dumpt unto my trousers.
triebwasser: shall we ring up a stinkerton?
cadwallader: wha'for, dear man? i just confessed to the smell-crime.
triebwasser: fair enough, my liege. 'tis a true abomination of the senses.
triebwasser: shall we ring up a stinkerton?
cadwallader: wha'for, dear man? i just confessed to the smell-crime.
triebwasser: fair enough, my liege. 'tis a true abomination of the senses.
by trilliam turdsworth November 05, 2019
Get the stinkerton mug.a ripple is a disturbance to the air resulting from a fart. typically sinusoidal in form, ripples vary in frequency and periodicity in accordance with the velocity and #stinkprofile of a given assblast. on rare occasion, a ripple may double back on itself, taking the form of a parametric curve. in this case, the vibrating farticules may produce intensities of stink that are frankly immeasurable.
while ripples were first described in rudimentary form by maimonides, and subsequently by leonardo davinci, it was not until the late nineteenth century that johnald g. stinkefeller, then seven years old, first documented the shape of a ripple using a device of his own devising known as a #blastmeter. forty years later, his calculations were confirmed by Albrecht A. Anustain.
while ripples were first described in rudimentary form by maimonides, and subsequently by leonardo davinci, it was not until the late nineteenth century that johnald g. stinkefeller, then seven years old, first documented the shape of a ripple using a device of his own devising known as a #blastmeter. forty years later, his calculations were confirmed by Albrecht A. Anustain.
todd: doth you smell-witness a stink in this chambre?
barry: doth i.
todd: where art the blastmeter?
barry: blast it open.
todd: i just shit my drawers. i can feelst the ripple.
barry: doth i.
todd: where art the blastmeter?
barry: blast it open.
todd: i just shit my drawers. i can feelst the ripple.
by trilliam turdsworth August 15, 2023
Get the ripple mug.