tagz's definitions

Gi-fucking-normous

adj. Almost un-fathomable in scope and size. Normally reserved for an object or objects that are large enough so as to be described as planetary in size. Larger than gi-normous by a factor of ten.

I hadn't seen her in 15 years. Her face looks good, but her ass is just gi-fucking-normous!

by tagz June 3, 2007

Substitweet

n. An assistant to a major celebrity who is responsible for keeping the celebrity Twitter page up-to-date.

Paris Hilton would NEVER say something like that. This must have been posted by her substitweet.

by Tagz June 8, 2009

bedgasm

A feeling of complete and utter euphoria which peaks when climbing into bed at the end of an 18-hour workday, a long road trip or hours of extremely strenuous physical activity. Under perfect conditions, the physical release has been likened to that of an intense sexual experience.

It was a three hour drive in the middle of the night, I could barely stay awake. When I got home, I climbed under the covers and had a ten-minute bedgasm.

by tagz July 29, 2007

precop

abbr. (pre-copulation agreement) A mutually binding agreement (usually verbal) by and between consenting adults prior to engaging in casual sex. The agreement stipulates that all involved parties are excused from emotional attachment, post coital contact, and any promise of future sex. Any and all disputes arising from said contract should be submitted and negotiated through binding arbitration. This agreement must involve a minimum of two individuals, with the maximum number to be determined in practical application.

Q: So, you stud, are you going to call Tina today?
A: No, I believe that would be a violation of our precop.

by tagz February 23, 2008

said no one ever

Declarative phrase appearing at the end of a statement which effectively negates the meaning of the previously stated text. Essentially, the presence of this statement instructs the reader that what has been stated up to this point is a fallacy in that no one would make that statement under any circumstances, at any time (in the past, present or future) in any corner of the known universe.

I am so tired of bacon that I hope I never have to eat it again. Said no one ever.

by tagz May 1, 2013

Fire The Retros!

Used as an interjection. Tells the subject he/she a)Is moving too quickly, b)Has gone too far in speech or action and needs to "back up" or c)Has breached the TMI rule and divulged something inappropriately personal.

Larry: Beth is the best thing that ever happened to me. I think I'm going to ask her to marry me. Will you help me look for a ring?
Danny: Fire The Retros! You met this girl like six weeks ago. Slow down you moron.

by Tagz January 15, 2009

Pee-gatory

Indecisive state of being upon waking in the middle of the night. Your body is too exhausted to get up, and your bladder is too full to get back to sleep.

We started drinking so early I fell asleep at 8 o'clock. When I woke up at 4:30, everyone was gone, and I was in Pee-gatory.

by Tagz December 9, 2008