tagz's definitions

Buying The Puppy

Phrase used to describe the act of developing an emotional attachment to a person, thing, or cause. The implied sentiment is that the commitment was taken on despite feelings of apprehension.

We tried to let David know we were concerned about his new girlfriend. We don't like her but it's too late . . . David is buying the puppy.

by Tagz May 2, 2008

Pee-gatory

Indecisive state of being upon waking in the middle of the night. Your body is too exhausted to get up, and your bladder is too full to get back to sleep.

We started drinking so early I fell asleep at 8 o'clock. When I woke up at 4:30, everyone was gone, and I was in Pee-gatory.

by Tagz December 9, 2008

Danger Wood

n. The immediate and ridiculously enormous boner that magically appears when it becomes obvious that you are about to engage in sex in a place or with a person (or both) that you shouldn't.

My roommates girlfriend just whispered in my ear that she wants to fuck me now, in the laundry room, while the party is going on. You can't imagine the Danger Wood I got when she said that!

by Tagz November 8, 2011

Buying Frozen Peas

Coded phrase for: "Getting a vasectomy" since part of the post-operative instructions suggest you place a bag of frozen peas on the sight of the incision for the first few days in order to reduce swelling.

We've decided not to have any more kids, so I'm seriously considering buying frozen peas.

by Tagz January 19, 2011

Dome Over

When a man begins losing his hair - and shaves his head completely, thinking no one will figure out that he's really doing it because he's bald. Similar to a Comb Over in that it's a feeble attempt to conceal a known condition.

Did you see Jared, he shaved his head! He said he wanted to do something different, but we know it's really a dome over.

by tagz February 23, 2008

bedgasm

A feeling of complete and utter euphoria which peaks when climbing into bed at the end of an 18-hour workday, a long road trip or hours of extremely strenuous physical activity. Under perfect conditions, the physical release has been likened to that of an intense sexual experience.

It was a three hour drive in the middle of the night, I could barely stay awake. When I got home, I climbed under the covers and had a ten-minute bedgasm.

by tagz December 9, 2008

Gasmic Bypass

n. A drastic change in mental or physical state causing a person to completely lose their appetite for sex. Comes in two forms: Temporary or Chronic.

Larry: According to our couples therapist, my spousal disinterest and insensitivity are the primary reasons for Linda's Gasmic Bypass.
Joe: Temporary?
Larry: Sadly, No. We've moved on to Chronic.

by Tagz February 28, 2009