tagz's definitions

Buying The Puppy

Phrase used to describe the act of developing an emotional attachment to a person, thing, or cause. The implied sentiment is that the commitment was taken on despite feelings of apprehension.

We tried to let David know we were concerned about his new girlfriend. We don't like her but it's too late . . . David is buying the puppy.

by Tagz May 2, 2008

Gasmic Bypass

n. A drastic change in mental or physical state causing a person to completely lose their appetite for sex. Comes in two forms: Temporary or Chronic.

Larry: According to our couples therapist, my spousal disinterest and insensitivity are the primary reasons for Linda's Gasmic Bypass.
Joe: Temporary?
Larry: Sadly, No. We've moved on to Chronic.

by Tagz February 28, 2009

Pee-gatory

Indecisive state of being upon waking in the middle of the night. Your body is too exhausted to get up, and your bladder is too full to get back to sleep.

We started drinking so early I fell asleep at 8 o'clock. When I woke up at 4:30, everyone was gone, and I was in Pee-gatory.

by Tagz December 9, 2008

Artificial Stupidity

n. Special circuitry wired into computers and other electronic equipment allowing it to alter it's programming in such a way that simple tasks which were performed flawlessly only moments ago are now beyond functional capability.

My PC no longer wants to recognize my data. I'm doing the same things I've always done, but now I've lost 6 months of work to artificial stupidity.

by Tagz June 21, 2011

said no one ever

Declarative phrase appearing at the end of a statement which effectively negates the meaning of the previously stated text. Essentially, the presence of this statement instructs the reader that what has been stated up to this point is a fallacy in that no one would make that statement under any circumstances, at any time (in the past, present or future) in any corner of the known universe.

I am so tired of bacon that I hope I never have to eat it again. Said no one ever.

by tagz May 1, 2013

Karmic Relief

Gesture of atonement. Actions taken to compensate for the accumulation of "bad" Karma.

Having spent years clawing his way to the top thinking nothing of his co-workers and their needs, Frank felt he was in need of some Karmic Relief.

by Tagz December 30, 2008

Romance-turbation

Act of creating a fictitious romantic relationship with someone you desire who is already attached, patently disinterested, or otherwise unattainable.

Kelly is already with Anthony so whatever story Joey tells you is all just romance-turbation.

by tagz November 1, 2008