t wade's definitions

Laura Welched

A Gen Y term used loosely to describe the state of an adolescent car crash victim (fatal or near fatal) caused by a careless (and/or not well intentioned) teenage driver.

Refers to the current First Lady (maiden name) and the 1963 fatal car “accident.” Laura Welch Bush ran a Midland, Texas stop sign crashing into another car which took the life of her then boyfriend, Mike Douglas.

For details Google search: Laura Welch Bush Fatal Accident Dallas Morning News

Yea man, it was a very gnarley crash. I watched as they untangled the shredded metal from around the engine block. It was tragic. The dude’s head and torso had been Laura Welched in the worst kind of way. Very ugly indeed.

by T Wade January 18, 2007

Jackson

Another name for a US Twenty Dollar Bill; US cash demonination featuring President Andrew Jackson - equivalent to twenty Franklins or four Lincolns.

Hey... stop at that ATM. I need a Jackson or two.

by T Wade November 24, 2005

Lynne Cheney

Previous author of juicy soft porn LESBIAN novel set in the pioneering old west titled, Sisters. Current wife of Dick and second lady only to Pickles ( see laura bush). Also chairman of the National Endowment for the Arts (have you applied for your grant yet?). In 2000 during an interview, Cokie Roberts asked about her openly gay daughter. She adamantly refused to answer the question and admonished Roberts for even bringing up the subject.

Lynne Cheney wanted to tell the publisher to “go fuck yourself” when she learned they were going to reprint her 80s novel about lesbians of the old west. She held her tongue since that was her husband's favorite line. Instead she said, "How dare you mention the word lesbian to me. You cock sucking shit stain.”

by T Wade November 5, 2005

bird flu

The latest Republican fear mongering talking point. Primary aim: Scare Americans with talk of pandemic in order to change the subject from Scooter Libby's indictment, Supreme Court nomination failure, Bush's approval rating at 38%, GOP decision to cut senior drug benefits, Karl Rove still under investigation, etc., etc.

White House Subject: bird flu
George W. Bush to Karl Rove:
"Don't forget to call Condi and remind her to talk about the horrors of the birdy flu panademic DISease. Does anyone in Amurica have this thing yet? We need pictures, TV interviews. This birdy thang is gonna save our arses."

by T Wade November 5, 2005

Big E

Term used to describe a type of Levi's Jeans produced from about 1930 to 1969; logo on famous Red Tab is printed as lEvi (i.e. upper case e) hence the name. Often associated with American West cowboy mythology. Also see hige.

The Japanese have gone cowboy crazy for Big E jeans. I just sold a pair on eBay for $500!

by T Wade October 21, 2005

Taupe Star

A term used to describe a person’s anus or sphincter muscle; derived from the general color and shape of this particular orifice.

Rule #1 - Always keep your Taupe Star shiny and clean.

by T Wade October 20, 2005

hige

According to one source on the internet hige refers to the creases across the top of the legs of vintage Levi jeans - usually the so called "big E" variety. It's like where the jeans bunch up when you sit down. However, I think it can also be used to refer to any person, place or thing that has a distressed, rather lived in look.

Damn. Laura is givin' some major hige today. Must be the drugs and that wild life she's livin'.

by T Wade October 17, 2005