secret agent man's definitions

jaheeyazussah

Correct pronunciation of the five letter word 'JESUS' by southern baptist evangelists. Properly introduced below. The final syllable is strongly under accented, almost as if the mouth had dropped open blankly after the final 's' sound.

I say, you are going to HAY-el, if you don't bu-LEAVE in ja-HEEya-zus(sah).

by Secret Agent Man September 17, 2003

hill of beans

In U.S. Marine jargon, comparative for something worthless when you can't say "isn't worth shit" or "isn't worth a rat's ass"

This equipment isn't worth a hill of beans, sir.

by Secret Agent Man September 19, 2003

fu

As used by movie columnist Joe Bob Briggs, a suffix indicating some specific form of mayhem in a movie.

The biggest fight scene in the Matrix Reloaded has truck fu, spook fu, doppelganger fu, and keanu fu.

by Secret Agent Man September 17, 2003

Skeezer

Undesirable female.

Have you noticed, on the Olympic Soccer Team, none of the women are skeezers? I think I detect a plan here.

by Secret Agent Man September 19, 2003

self-shaft

In college, a difficult professor might shaft the class. By extension, 'self-shaft' means taking the same class independent study.

Calc 3? I'm taking that self-shaft next semester.

by Secret Agent Man September 17, 2003

hose job

Metaphorical term for fucking someone, or fucking them over. A metaphor for a metaphor!

My boss gave me Dave's project--that's a hose job if ever I heard of one.

Yeah, the vending machine don't work; someone poured salt water into it trying to hose job it into dropping all its change.

by Secret Agent Man September 18, 2003

unstable molecules

The magic material Reed Richards of the Fantastic Four invented so that superheroes wouldn't shred / burn / rip up their clothing when they used their superpowers. Now used figuratively to mean some material that you just can't get rid of or rip up.

The shrink wrap on this CD must be made out of unstable molecules.

by Secret Agent Man September 17, 2003