Definitions by scodder

dog nuts 

Dog nuts are nuts that are served to dogs.

A crunchy treat.

Pedro was arrested and had his dog nuts cart confiscated until he explained he was selling nuts for dogs, not from dogs.

dog nuts by scodder June 6, 2010

did you screw my duck

"Did you screw my duck?" is what to say if you're walking through a park and see someone person screwing a duck.

A good follow up is to demand $50, and make them think they're getting off lightly.

Spencer saw Doofus screwing a duck by the duck pond, and said "Did you screw my duck?"

"Yes," whimpered Doofus.

"You know the drill," said Spencer sternly.

Doofus handed over $50 and scampered away, soiling himself lightly as he ran.

did you screw my duck by scodder June 6, 2010

fireworks monkey 

A fireworks monkey is a monkey tied to a large fireworks rocket.

The screeching on the way up is amazing.

On the way down - not so much.

The kids at the 4th of July picnic eagerly lined up to watch the fireworks monkey show.

They were not disappointed.

fireworks monkey by scodder June 5, 2010

brown avalanche 

A brown avalanche is the fecal equivalent of a golden shower.

Hank gave Cecilia $50 for a brown avalanche.

She climbed to the top of a stepladder and gave him his money's worth.

brown avalanche by scodder June 4, 2010

pumping the shark 

Pumping the shark means having sex with a shark.

Not a recommended activity.

Zombo emerged from the water all chewed up.

"What happened to you?" asked Zongo.

"Pumping the shark," said Zombo, tucking his badly mauled wally back into his trunks.

pumping the shark by scodder June 3, 2010

my basset hound is gay 

"My basset hound is gay," is what to say when your basset is raping another dog.

"Mr. Basset" grabbed the chihuahua by the collar, shook it into unconsciousness, and then drove his huge red tadger into the chihuahua's rump.

"My basset hound is gay," said Oscar, as the chihuahua's owner let out a small cry and collapsed.

my basset hound is gay by scodder June 3, 2010

humping the shark 

Humping the shark means having sex with a shark.

Not a recommended activity.

When Gus came out of the water he was all chewed up.

"What have you been doing?" asked Mungo.

"Humping the shark," said Gus, tucking his badly mauled willy back into his trunks.

humping the shark by scodder June 2, 2010