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Definitions by peter kobs

Comp Call 

1. A compensation foul in football. The officials sometimes "call" a foul on team B in order to make up for a questionable foul against team A earlier in the game.

2. The unwritten law of refereeing: If you make a mistake that hurts team A, try to make up for it by calling a foul against team B later in the game. Wait at least 3:00 on the game clock so the "comp call" isn't blatantly obvious.

3. A foolish attempt to "balance" the impact of poor officiating in a high school football game.
Did you see that procedure foul on Central High in the second quarter? It was an obvious comp call to make up for that ridiculous holding call against Lakewood in the first quarter.
Comp Call by Peter Kobs September 26, 2009

Pre-Abandoned 

1. A building or military installation that is never intended to be used, but which must be constructed anyway for political reasons.

2. A public space that planners know will never be occupied or properly used. It gets built anyway to satisfy a planning commission or zoning board.

3. The act of constructing something useless and pointless because it is demanded by an overall "plan."
"Did you hear about those Pre-Abandoned schools in Iraq? They built them out in the desert without any electricity or air conditioning. No one will ever use them, but at least they look good on paper."
Pre-Abandoned by Peter Kobs September 22, 2009

House Heckler 

1. A politician who openly heckles, threatens or attacks the President of the United States on the House Floor during a joint session of Congress.

2. Any person who brazenly violates the code of civility and decorum of the U.S. House of Representatives, especially elected officials.

3. Rep. Joe Brown of South Carolina, who yelled "You lie!" at our first African-American President during his speech on health care to Congress on Sept. 9, 2009. (Brown's contention that the proposed health care reform bill would somehow insure illegal aliens was later deemed false on both FactCheck.org and Politifact.org.)
"Did you ever meet Joe Brown? He's that infamous House Heckler who called Obama a liar on the floor of Congress during a speech by the President."
House Heckler by Peter Kobs September 10, 2009

Yoop Loop 

1. A scenic route around Michigan's Upper Peninsula, which is also known as the "U.P." or "Yoop." Motorcyclists are especially fond of this semi-wilderness experience.

2. An alternative route from Wisconsin to lower Michigan. Instead of slogging through the heavy traffic of metro Chicago, adventurous drivers can take the "Yoop Loop" over the top of Lake Michigan and then across the Mackinac Bridge to lower Michigan. Longer, yes, but way more beautiful.

3. A generic term for any trip that takes the traveler through Michigan's Upper Peninsula en route to somewhere else -- one of the great undiscovered pleasures of the North Country.
"Don't drive through that traffic mess in Chicago. Let's take the Yoop Loop instead."

"What if our car breaks down and we're attacked by bears?"

"It's better than being attacked by gang bangers on the Dan Ryan Expressway!"
Yoop Loop by Peter Kobs September 9, 2009

Pixel Envy

1. Envy of another person's higher-resolution camera or flat-panel display screen.

2. The sudden realization that 8 Megapixels no longer cuts it in the digital photography world.
"Daryl has a bad case of Pixel Envy ever since his girlfriend got that new 10 MP Nikon SLR. He may never recover."
Pixel Envy by Peter Kobs September 4, 2009

Orphan Key 

Many people have a stash of old keys in a drawer or cabinet for "future use." Some keys have been there so long that you no longer remember what they're for. A bike lock? An old car? A cabinet at work? These are Orphan Keys.
"Honey, can we get rid of those stupid Orphan Keys in the strong box?"

"Absolutely not! One of them might open that safe we buried in the back yard during the Nixon administration...if we can find it."
Orphan Key by Peter Kobs August 25, 2009

Chain of Lies 

1. An e-mail chain containing defammatory or false information that is spread far and wide by partisan believers in an attempt to paint a negative image of the opposition.

2. The act of forwarding sensationalistic, untrue reports without checking their veracity.

3. How lies go viral on the Internet.

4. A modern-day illustration of Mark Twain's adage: "A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes."
You know that story about supposed "FEMA concentration camps" in the desert? It's just part of that Chain of Lies started by that militia group in Texas.
Chain of Lies by Peter Kobs August 21, 2009