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nethcev!'s definitions

art

The most belligerent expression of political, spiritual or emotional conception known to man; art is literally transforming one's most inflamed personal sentiments and perceptions into a tangible creation, designed for no other purpose then the architect's own personal satisfaction. Anything else is a marketing scheme.
Renoir was an artist. Hugh Hefner is a salesman.
by nethcev! April 28, 2004
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Apologetics

A branch of Christian theology devoted to the study and defense of the holy origins of scripture, as well as the divinely ordained authority of the Church alone to interpret it. To fail apologetics is a sign of intelligence.
My "F" in freshman Apologetics eventually led me to drop out of semenary and enroll in an Ivy league University.
by nethcev! November 22, 2005
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Smile

An insignificant facial expression which is intended to suggest feelings of euphoria, satisfaction or relaxed complacency to others, but in actuality, more often serves as a social mask to disguise one’s true feelings.
Oh villain, villain, smiling, damned Villain!
My tables - meet it is I set it down,
That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain;
At least I'm sure it may be so in Denmark

Hamlet, Shakespeare
by nethcev! September 5, 2006
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History

1. An argument for the cause of the present.
2. The study of man’s previous disasters, taught to ensure that future generations will never make the embarrassing mistake of repeating them, but will instead set about making new and even more complicated blunders.
3. The study of catastrophic events and the assholes that caused them. While preparing for an historical exam, one should note that any individual mentioned in the assigned textbook who was responsible for the death of at least a quarter of a million people, is probably worth mentioning on the test.
History is in itself an example.
by nethcev! August 20, 2006
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exorcist

One who combines the power of prayer with sacred ritual, as part of a desperate attempt to drive demonic forces from the bodies of spiritual hypochondriacs.
You can usually find an exorcist or two on one of those Hallmark channels that broadcast only at three or so in the morning.
by nethcev! August 24, 2006
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Chicago

Like a speck of gold in a muddy riverbed, Chicago is the pearl of an otherwise abysmal region known as “the Midwest.”
"I spent my first year of college in Chicago at DePaul University. I learned that they call it "the windy city" because it truly blows to live there."
by nethcev! August 24, 2006
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Rap

A particular genre of popular music which provides the listener with a symphonic experience that is on a par with having a stranger masturbate into one’s eardrum. This includes a throbbing, repetitive rhythm, or “beat” - which is equivalent to the motion of a hand running up and down the length of a male’s phallus - while simultaneously listening to some horny high school dropout rhyming and rambling off about his desire to “knock boots” with the listener, while concurrently threatening to “bust a cap in your ass” if the audience member refuses to respect his “slim shady.” To listen to rap music is essentially to be raped in the ear.
"Doctor Drae" is a rap artist.
by nethcev! September 9, 2006
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