Dench Shit

Mother: Alex where you been for the past half an hour!
Alex: Sorry I was just taking a dench shit
by mrperson123 August 25, 2017
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Mill Hill

Area in London. It's main street is Mill Hill Broadway, which is filled with coffee shops, over priced boutiques, and small chain shops with a crappy selection of everything. Everything closes at 6pm except a shitty pub and a few crappy restaurants. The Broadway is frequented by rich unemployed housewives that gossip about shit. There's no Underground Station, just a lousy Overground one with trains that run far less frequently. Despite Mill Hill being an overall dull area, the road is always busy with constant traffic and nowhere to park. It's way more pricey than the neighbouring Edgware, which is nuts as Edgware has far better amenities and transport links.
Scenario one
Bob: Hey, lets meet up in Mill Hill!
Bill:Ugh no! Mill Hill sucks, there's nothing to do there except go to a crappy coffee shop!

Scenario two

Tom drives to Mill Hill for a business meeting at a coffee shop
Tom: Omg why's there so much bloody traffic here! And why's no nowhere to bloody park! Ugh I hate Mill Hill!
by mrperson123 December 13, 2018
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Fapentines Day

When you're alone on Valentines Day so you basically spend the day fapping to Porn.

Happy Fapentines Day!
Scenario 1
Marko: So Bryan you got any plans for Valentines Day?
Bryan: It's another Fapentines Day for me Bro. Jen text dumped 5 days ago. So my plans are being holed up in my room and fapping away.

Scenario 2
Anne: Hey Alice you manage to find a date for Valentines?

Alice: Sadly no, It's Fapentines Day for me. I've already bought my lube and charged up my vibrator. Gonna scrounge porn hub later.
by mrperson123 February 14, 2020
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Shmecky Puntz

Yiddish word for smelly vagina. Possibly smells of fish and other unclean odors. When a woman stinks of B.O. chances are she has a Shmecky Puntz.
Man 1: My friend Emily absolutely reeks of B.O.!

Man 2: She probably has a Shmecky Puntz!
by mrperson123 March 31, 2017
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Half Kosher

When a Jew will eat non Kosher meat like beef and chicken, but won't eat a non kosher animal like pork or prawns. Something secular Jews do as they think it's better than fully breaking kosher, when in reality there's no difference.
Don:Hey Emily would you like some of my ham and cheese sandwich?

Emily: No Don! I can't have that! It's not kosher!
Don: Erm, Emily you do know that sandwich you're eating is non kosher chicken right?
Emily: Yeah but I eat non kosher meat, just not non kosher animals.
Don: So you're half kosher.
by mrperson123 February 14, 2020
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Uh uhs

Kid:Grandpa would you like some tea?

Grandpa: No thanks, Tea is liquid uh uhs.

Mum:Ok who wants salad?
Kid: Ew no, salad is uh uhs!
by mrperson123 August 31, 2017
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J Swipe

Jewish Tinder, filled with JAPs and Becks. But unlike Tinder there's unlimited likes and unlike J Date it's free!
Ben: Man I'm sick of getting no matches on Tinder, and my parents keep whining at me to find a Jewish girl, fml.
Sam: Try J Swipe, I've had a bunch of dates from it. But watch out for becks!
by mrperson123 July 25, 2017
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