mike payne's definitions
by Mike Payne March 6, 2008
Get the switchmug. Scratches and dents that appear on a car after driving through a wooded area without concern for wildlife.
While driving through the woods with a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other, Jason felt a bump and hoped that his insurance covered deer dents.
by Mike Payne May 16, 2008
Get the deer dentsmug. We thought Laurie's face was bright red because she had been fake-tanning again. However, upon stepping out into the front of the office it was apparent that Jason delivered another old squeaker.
by Mike Payne May 2, 2008
Get the old squeakermug. After days of his wife's pleading to have another child so McGruff would have someone to play with, Jason grabbed a 30-pack out of the fridge, picked up the keys to his tractor, and told his wife to go get a turkey baster baby.
by Mike Payne April 3, 2008
Get the turkey baster babymug. When a girl walks around with the zipper of her pants pulled down. This is the female equivalent of selling hotdogs.
Ania didn't know why Jason kept staring at her pants until she looked down and realized that she was marketing tacos.
by Mike Payne March 24, 2008
Get the marketing tacosmug. The manager at the goat rental store suspected that Jason was lying about his rental goat running away when she saw the barbecue sauce stains all over his shirt.
by Mike Payne March 24, 2008
Get the goat rentalmug. When a woman is so bitchy you want to smash her face in the couch cushion and press as hard as you can while slam fucking her in the ass as hard as possible
by Mike Payne June 11, 2008
Get the cushion burnermug.