Skip to main content

luke warm's definitions

Choice

Choice is something we all have

While many choices are hard; decisions still need to be made
Some choices you may like to consider:

1. We have the choice to make our own choices.
2. We have the choice to be honest with ourselves.
3. We have the choice to be a bogan if we so wish; we also have the choice to be a better bogan.
4. We have the choice to forget and to remember.
5. We have the choice to care or not to care.
6. We have the choice to be ourselves or to hide from ourselves.
7. We have the choice to trust and to have faith; we have the choice to be too scared.
8. We have the choice to change our minds if we so wish; we also have the choice to change them back.
9. We have the choice to do the right thing by ourselves and others; this should not need to be a choice.
10. We have the choice to grow or to hold ourselves back.
11. We have the choice to be strong (assistance may be required)
12. We have the choice to listen to the universe as we have the choice to be only normal.
13. We have the choice to follow the rules or to think for ourselves.
14. We have the choice to listen and to be listened to.
15. We have the choice to be respected even if we are not used to it.
16. We have the choice to lie or to be honest (refer: point 1) - caution: the choice to lie, as with all other choices has consequences including (but not limited to):
Damage to the heart, mind and soul of yourself and those who truly care for you.

There is not always a choice:

We do not choose to fall in love; it just happens.
Love is not found at the pub (Scrot-rot and Random Bogans are)
True love is not something you look for, pursue or find; it finds you.

Love is all, there is nothing else.
by Luke Warm October 16, 2008
mugGet the Choice mug.

What the fuck?

An expression used to convey various reactions to events. ‘What the fuck?’ may be used in an attempt to explain any one or combination of the reactions/emotions listed below and then some.

A: Confusion
B: Incredulous confusion
C: Surprise
D: Disappointment
E: Hurt
F: Anger
G: Ironically
What the fuck?’ Is rarely used as a positive statement; however it may be used ironically to convey such is life (refer ex G)


A: Confusion
Why would someone use someone else who is in love with them?

B: Incredulous confusion
How could you use me to make him jealous?, to get yourself a valentines day present?, to add some excitement to your life?, to distract you?, to improve your ego?, to do most of your study?, to improve your sex life?

C: Surprise
It is a surprise to me that people can even think that way, can lie so much even to themselves, can take pleasure from causing others pain, can actually be proud of themselves for being a total arsehole

D: Disappointment
It disappoints me that even now you cannot tell the truth; that you can forget so much so easily; that it was all a lie, all just a game to you

E: Hurt
Guess what? – when you think you can feel no more pain, there is always more. To be lied to and used by someone that you have given yourself to is more hurt than anyone should have to feel

F: Anger
I am angry at myself for being a tool; I sometimes feel anger towards Tracey for being a bogan

G: Ironically
Everything I do even now, benefits you in your little game and hurts me even more. Every chance I give you just allows you to tell more lies; I am sick of Tracey time. I will talk to him, the truth will by known one way or the other. This is between us three; if he will not speak to me, I will speak to others. I have given more than enough opportunities for the truth to be told. This cannot continue. You will always be a Victorian

Tuesday 11/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 23, 2008
mugGet the What the fuck? mug.

Jade

Jade is a generally green semi precious gemstone and as well as being a colour (Hex: 558A84 RGB: 85,138,132.) It is also the best name for a female (of any species) The name Jade is best suited to someone with dark hair and tends to conjure up an oriental feel (mmm... sounds hot)
The love of my life,
My reason for existence;
All my dreams come true,
I offer no resistance.

Bad poetry will I write,
far past the end of time;
my drink of choice is vodka,
with soda, lemon and lime.

Life is hard, I must admit my despair
I am in love, all should be so sweet
What is so right cannot be wrong
I love you

Note: it is the authors opinion that poetry does not have to rhyme. This point is especially valid when the poetry in question is of such a poor standard as is the case above.

However; this is of no importance as
I love Jade and I will continue to regardless of everything

Jade is Sweetness
Tracey is a Bogan
I am and have always been The lowest priority
by Luke Warm December 23, 2008
mugGet the Jade mug.

Church of Cliff Richard

Abstaining from sexual activities for whatever reason

Cliff Richard is a member of the Church of Cliff Richard (I have my own doubts on the validity of his claim though)
There are a wide variety of circumstances/choices that may qualify one for induction into the Church of Cliff Richard.

These include but are certainly not limited to:
1. Lack of interest
2. Lack of opportunity
3. Lack of effort
4. Lack of time
5. Lack of intelligence
6. Lack of self esteem/self worth/meaning/ego/gerbils/etc
7. Lack of puberty
8. Lack of appendages (apologies to those lacking appendages. Second hand hardly used or virgin appendages can be purchased at the gift shop of your local ‘Cliff’ – most of these have been repeatedly polished to perfection by experts in their field)
9. Physically unattractive to that which you are attracted to.
10. Emotionally unattractive to that which you are attracted to.
11. Morally unattractive to that which you are attracted to. (not necessarily a bad thing if they are evil n’ stuff, Bogans,)
12. Financially unattractive to that which you are attracted to.
13. Painful history/ poor choice in previous co-pilots on the airship of love

Excerpt from ‘The big book of Cliff – Chapter 11 The toe of the camel, verse 8:

And Cliffs half-brother Ralph’s next door neighbour’s grand daughter’s friend’s uncle did sayeth:

“I do believe there is at least one soul mate out there for everyone.
But there are approximately 6,869,575,369 (Six Billion, eight hundred and sixty nine million, five hundred and seventy five thousand, three hundred and sixty nine) people on this planet (most of them Bogans – that is a truck load of Bogans) at the moment; give up now, more chance of winning the lottery than finding true love. There is also the possibility that your soul mate could be born on the day that you die at the ripe old age of 267 after an extremely long, lonely, boring and meaningless life; that would kind of suck, but on the bright side you would be dead so you wouldn’t know anyway ”

Go Cliff, its ya birfday
…on Monday 14/10/1940
Hmm… “Monday’s child is fair of face” – too true, Cliff always did have very nice facial skin – very tanned for a Pom, very tanned indeed.

Luke Warm is a proud (refer: tool) member of the Church of Cliff Richard
While this is not a philosophy that I preach in the streets; it is who I am and is very important to me (refer: tool).
Anything or anyone that has an issue with my beliefs is more than welcome to do whatever they wish as long as it does not involve turning me on in anyway. You have been warned, I will most likely explode …and then some from any external stimuli regardless of whether it be emotional or physical.

Remember kids…
“It is indeed rad and hot to be Cliff
You cannot get hurt if you do not have feelings.
Close your heart and your soul, limit your mind; be one with nothing.”

Saturday 20/12/2008
by Luke Warm December 23, 2008
mugGet the Church of Cliff Richard mug.

Scrot rot

Slang abbreviation of the fungal disease 'Scrophulareaceae Rot'

Although this invigorating fungi is primarily to be found growing on plants within the Scrophulareaceae family; it can also commonly be observed (under magnification) on Woolly bush (Adenanthos serecieus) and on the hirsute gonad pouch of the lesser brained Random bogan
Bogan1: "Tafe was so luke warm today; it is a good thing I had the scrot rot to keep me company"
Bogan2 (bogan in denial of being a bogan): You are such a Bogan

Dude1: "Dude, I have to tell you something; I dont think you are going to be krossd about it"
Dude2: "Dude, you know you can tell me anything dude. You're like my brother from another mother, dude"
Dude1: Well since you brought that up. I caught the scrot rot from you mums hot knickers dude; I'm sorry dude, but Im so scared, please hold me dude"
Dude2: Fuck off you Random bogan mother fucker
Dude1: Fair enough dude

In all seriousness folks, we have to inform you that the risk of contracting 'Scrot rot' in todays world of automobiles, double ended purple dildo bongs and other such fancy stuff is all too real.
We must protect ourselves; we must preserve our way of life for the good of humanity; for the survival of the earth herself.
Please; if you care you can help, you can make a real difference – it will only take half an hour or so a week out of your busy life, and it is both satisfying and easy to do. Take the time to shave or wax your 'fun zone' - it is the only way we can contain this epidemic and save countless souls the undeniable agony of itchy nuts.

Thankyou for your consideration of this matter.

This community service announcement was generously brought to you by the guys n’ gals down at:
Be a better Bogan inc.
Bobs dildo shop “From big to small, we shall fill them all”
And
Lionels house of Mirkin “mmm… Lionels”
by Luke Warm October 21, 2008
mugGet the Scrot rot mug.

Random Bogan

Random:
1. Someone of little significance
2. Everyone that you don't know and some that you do

Bogan:
1. Trailer trash
2. Your mother
3. see above
4. Look around, they are everywhere. Can often be found at Safeway or exploring Woolly bush while wearing a flannelette shirt, black acca-dacca t-shirt or wife basher singlet as well as tight black jeans and desert boots (DB's).
There are three main keys to correctly identifying a Bogan:

1. The obligatory packet of wini-blues rolled up in the sleeve to draw attention to the guns that they have developed from years of being a wanker;

2. The stubby or can of Victoria Bitter (VB); which also proves how little taste and class Bogans possess; and

3. The 'Mullet' the haircut with its own motto:
'Business at the front, party at the back'
in some circles also referred to as:
'Party at the back, business at the front'
Either way it is still a shit haircut

Random Bogan:
Look in the mirror; tell me what you see
I wish these Random Bogans would just get out of my way

There are so many Random Bogans here; it is not hot. I would go so far as to say that it is so Luke warm here right now

So little air, so many Random Bogans

Your mother is a Random Bogan.
That makes your father a 'Random Bogan Mother Fucker'.
Guess that must really suck for you; good thing that as you are also a Random Bogan, no-one really gives a fuck

Harden the fuck up; stop being a Random Bogan
by Luke Warm August 3, 2008
mugGet the Random Bogan mug.

The Stares

When one becomes vacant during an activity and appears to be staring off into space

The stares occur due to a lack of interest in the local environment, activity or people due to too much self interest and the attention span of a stoned butterfly that flunked out of butterfly primary school in the 3rd grade for licking bus windows instead of innuendo laden flower parts.
NotaBogan: ...It means a lot to me; I cant even begin to tell you how much of a difference this could make ...are you even listening?

ABogan4sure: Umm, what?, sorry Bogan I must have had the stares

NotaBogan: Well thank you for making me feel less than random yet again

ABogan4sure: Oh harden the fuck up and stop being a bogan

NotaBogan: I am so sorry that you have done something to hurt me again and blamed me for it. How could I be so thoughtless as to have feelings.

ABogan4sure: I dont have the energy for this any more

NotaBogan: You are truly the most Awesome friend

The example above may appear a tad random and ‘NotaBogan’ may also appear to be over-reacting somewhat; however, repeated episodes of the stares do tend to add up and become rather annoying (refer: Tracey Smiff)

Wednesday 05/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 22, 2008
mugGet the The Stares mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email