Subhuman Resources

That which passes for Human Resources, the corporate repository for people too feckless, indolent and dull-witted to survive by eating out of dumpsters. Circumventing the certain risk to production, process or profit these fools represent, Subhuman Resources serves the double purpose of barring such incompetents from mucking up the works by turning them loose to harry the employees who actually do contribute to company success.

Famously sexless, humorless and brainless, this office also serves to repel rodents if, ironically, by employing them.
When April was caught stealing employee lunch boxes they promoted her to Subhuman Resources
by lexicali slim September 08, 2010
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glennbeck

slang for venereal warts (condyloma acuminata radio mendacious) commonly manifested as fat, soft, moist, pink, or flesh-colored gorgons, typically in the genital area. They may be bloated, gasseous, small or smaller. They often combine to form a large cauliflower-shaped blowhard of a rushlimbaughlike node known to give off noxious gasses and peurile nonsense; the only known venereal disease resulting from terminal onanism
whoa, what's that on your blowhole- you've got glennbeck
by lexicali slim September 26, 2009
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culture shift

phenomenon whereby nothing new ever actually happens. millions of angry, brainless, slack-jawed simpletons monopolize every bit of bandwidth extant texting their frustration about this intolerable state of affairs because they believe there must be a reason for their lot, ergo the atmosphere is rent and the culture shifted. the mindless uninspired who insist on affixing a title and definition to a perennial state of nothingness are proof that nothing is ever new. one day it's nascar, the next day teaparties.
it's like- oh, my god- i'm like totally freaking out. peace out, orange county, i'm like so totally over this culture shift.
by lexicali slim February 27, 2010
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emoticonvoluted

confused attempt to communicate by use of punctuation keys on a device with a complete alphabetical keyboard.
;/* i perceive as some sort of comment however emoticonvoluted
by lexicali slim September 23, 2009
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condoleezza

practical joke gone tragically wrong. fearing their daughter might one day occupy a position of high moment, strategic importance and international infamy, the reverend and mrs john and angelena rice gave to their only child a name of such improbable ugliness and unwieldly, supurfluous vowel usage as to cauterize any chance of success in public life. sadly, the world now knows their daughter condoleezza as the highest ranking bunifa extant, house negro (see; malcom x's definition), accomplice and willing tool of the criminal george bush regime.
mamma; gastroniquia, where my popeye chicken at?
bunifa; condoleezza done et it up with marss dick chainie
by lexicali slim September 26, 2009
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geo metrosexual

intrinsic definition of metrosexual, an idiomatic obfuscation of asexual or sexual in any manner about which one is confused or ashamed.
emotional dishonesty+cheap shoes=geo metrosexual
by lexicali slim September 21, 2009
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classhole

1)one who purports to a superiority which is manifestly unfounded; 2)one who takes umbrage at people who attend a school reunion not of their graduation year
get biff, talking about his all inclusive vacation, wearing a brown suit, driving a grand am gt, sporting a zircon, acting like the aly khan. he's such a classhole.

or;

biff wouldn't speak to me at the reunion because i didn't graduate with him. what a classhole.
by lexicali slim September 15, 2009
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