Trump: "Yes, it's true - a grabbed her by the pussy!"
Guy talking to Trump: "That's it? You mean you also didn't give her a Backwards Thumbs Up? I'm...disappointed!"
Guy talking to Trump: "That's it? You mean you also didn't give her a Backwards Thumbs Up? I'm...disappointed!"
by joe995 October 05, 2024
Old Maid I'd Like To Fuck
A woman who never married or had kids, yet in middle age she is still very hot - and really gets around. Loves to babysit her plainer-looking sister's kids so she can shower them with gifts and treats just like a grandmother, much to the resentment of her sister - especially when that sister's husband can't take his eyes off her (seeing what 'could've been') when she visits.
Much more rare that an actual MILF, but will be more common soon as more people will choose not to marry and/or have kids.
A woman who never married or had kids, yet in middle age she is still very hot - and really gets around. Loves to babysit her plainer-looking sister's kids so she can shower them with gifts and treats just like a grandmother, much to the resentment of her sister - especially when that sister's husband can't take his eyes off her (seeing what 'could've been') when she visits.
Much more rare that an actual MILF, but will be more common soon as more people will choose not to marry and/or have kids.
Husband (talking to his buddies at work): "Wow, you should've seen my wife's sis show up to see to the kids while me and my wife went to dinner. She was such a OMILF! The kids were pretty happy too, though my wife wasn't..."
by joe995 September 14, 2023
A stoplight (traffic light) located at the intersection of a VERY busy highway - and a local road in a tiny little town in the middle of nowhere, where the highway passes through. The stoplight has EQUAL time at "red" (stop) on both the highway and the road. As a result, at rush hour, the highway traffic is backed up for miles, while there is few, if any vehicles on the local road. The locals don't care, but the traffic slowdown effects businesses, livelihoods and sanity in the bigger cities at either end of the highway.
(Driving to work) Aw man! There seems to be a traffic jam up ahead - oh wait...(looks at Google Maps)...it's just a Yokel Stoplight on this route. Should've took the interstate instead.
by joe995 April 19, 2025
When a guy is naked, lying on his back, and due to extreme excitement, or more likely, extreme fear, he pees a strong stream of urine straight up all over himself.
(Dude, lying in bed naked, wakes up, seeing a burglar hovering over him with a gun to his head)
Dude: "Please don't kill me!"
Burglar: "I might, (cocks gun) just to have no witnesses, hahaha!!!"
Dude: "OOOOHHHH NOOOOOOO!!!!!"
(dude starts peeing like a baby)
Dude: "Please don't kill me!"
Burglar: "I might, (cocks gun) just to have no witnesses, hahaha!!!"
Dude: "OOOOHHHH NOOOOOOO!!!!!"
(dude starts peeing like a baby)
by joe995 July 18, 2023