jAkE's definitions

christmas tree lights

Small, bright, white or multicolored lights on long strands for the purpose of decorating Christmas trees, houses, and plants during the Holiday season.

While they are usually used to decorate Christmas trees, they can be used year-round to decorate back porches, shrubbery, or college dorm rooms.

"Those Christmas tree lights really brighten up your 12'x15' concrete block room"

by Jake February 17, 2005

hot box

the act of farting in a car filled with people, then locking the windows, forcing the people in the car to smell your fart

(while driving, alex farts and locks the window)
Alex: HOT BOX!
Jimmy, Robert and Susan: NO! I CAN'T BREATHE!

by jake May 4, 2006

Tally

A penis. Derived from the word tallywhacker, whose definition is also a penis.

"I want to suck his tally!" said Derek.

by Jake October 26, 2004

cocksmoker

(1) a guy who sucks cock

(2) an asshole; somebody who really gets you pissed off

(3) a jerk, a jerkoff

(1) That Alvin is a cocksmoker, he sucked Freddy off in the shower room after the game

(2) Buddy's a cocksmoker, I don't want to see his face this weekend.

(3) He's just a cocksmoker, a total jerkoff, he is.

by Jake February 17, 2004

Smoking the Sausage

When a person sucks a animals cock.

Laura smoked baily's sausage last night.

by jake August 6, 2004

social security

A pyramid scheme run by the US Government. They promised to take your money to invest it for you so you'd have enough money to retire on, but from the very beginning they've just paid the people who are over 65 with the money sent in by the workers under 65. For any other organization to do this would be illegal. They don't make any real investments at all. They only 'invest' in other government agencies, which means they'll end up being paid back with yet more tax money taken by force from hard working Americans.

Joe Average says "I wanted to invest my money in a private account that I could control in order to plan for my retirement, but after paying tax for Social Security I didn't have enough left over to do that. If Social Security is so great, why do they have to force you to pay for it under threat of prison? If it was really so great, wouldn't people participate voluntarily?"

by Jake August 10, 2004

she has a nice personality

"She has a nice personality" is what you say about the fat girl or the ugly girl because you don't want to say anything mean. She can be a troll or coyote ugly but if she has any redeeming quality (such as big tits, nice clear skin, good teeth or decent lower legs) or you just don't want to be rude in front of the person you're talking to, you say this.

1: "I'm gonna hook you up with my girlfriend's best friend."
2: "What does she look like?"
1: "Um... she has a nice personality!"
2: "you mean she's not very good-looking?"
1: "um...true, but Ellen tells me that she pays her own way and gives great blowjobs"

by Jake February 20, 2004